Person with solid temperament

Faces life’s tempest

That befalls without visible clue

Resulting in shock so rude

Undettered, brave-hearts face calamity

With head held high and courage so steely

Try reaching the objective

In life with dogged personal resolve

That emanates from inner recesses of mind

Drawing out the energy hidden

And changing it into observant one

Thence attacking adversity

Head on slowly but surely

Fully realizing that buffets of fortune

Smiles on only those fortunates’

Who climb even on the dark clouds

By making these as their stepping-stones

For forging ahead with fervor bereft of fear

Conversely, in ease and peace

Thrives, even a weak and meek!

God’s graces those daring few

Who in adversity never say die.


Though it may seem farfetched yet fact remains; the time gone by is good or bad depends upon the experiences we had from unfavourable ones. Adverse situations, if exploited meaningfully, could bring in its wake wholesome results if we care to take lessons from these. Those people who wilt under the weight of adversity surely have to fend for themselves in the long run. Further, people not facing adversity head on never had their names inscribed in the annals of history. It is in adversity only when our character passes through the litmus test of ‘time’ – time which waits for none. Our personal intentions, inner resolve, perseverance, etc are tested while in the midst of adverse situations. One who faces the onslaughts of time and weathers the storm ultimately will come out unscathed.

Basically, this resolve and will to fight, besides how to remain determined is imbibed from the lap of mother in the childhood itself. It has been a truth that relationship between the child and the mother is a special one and no other relationship equals mother-child relationship. We’ve umpteenth examples to prove this aspect. We know that Lava and Kusha could become brave due to the teachings of Sita Mata while in exile in a hermitage in jungles! Shivaji could become great warrior due to the lessons given by his mother Jijjabhai. The love and care bestowed by Putlibhai had a lasting effect on Mohanchand Karam Chand Gandhi – for the contribution he made in the freedom struggle and his message of non-violence and satyagraha for which he is known the world over and we call him Bapuji with love. All the famous and illustrious historical figures became so because of the initial lessons that these personages got from their mothers.

Mother represents Nature and that is why we call it Mother Nature. It gives us everything viz air, water, sun besides meeting our life supporting needs. But what we give It in return? We actually spoil its balance by spewing poisonous gases in the atmosphere. That is the return gift we give to Mother Nature! In the similar vein, what we are giving to our biological mother; while we are grown up; that every individual can fathom. A mother never strays away from the path of motherhood and accompanying responsibilities; barring a few though.

The history is the guide in unraveling that trials and tribulations faced by Helen Keler, Ribert Bruce, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, Rani Lakshmibhai of Jhansi, Shivaji and many others leaders in their own rights specific to their own countries contributed their mite and thus immortalized themselves. These personages worked under adverse situations and earned coveted place for themselves which history will not forget.

Then we have the examples of scientists whose contributions for their inventions and discoveries cannot be forgotten. They worked day and night under adverse conditions. They had nothing to bank on except their indomitable courage and will to excel. In this, the names of scientists like Thomas Edison (Electric Bulb), AG Bell (Telephone), Karl Diesel (Diesel Engine), Albert Einstein (Theory of relativity), G. Marconi (Radio transmission), to name a few. In the same way, great sages and thinkers/philosophers of East and West have etched their names by giving to the world texts containing unparalleled wisdom which will remain influencing from generations to generations. This was accomplished through unstinted penance and sustained work under adverse situations.

Thence, we’ve the example of Maharishi Valmiki who used to rob people for the sustenance of his family till such time he got a sweet lesson of his life and he metamorphosed into through the chant of RAM NAMA and immortalized himself by giving us the great gift in the form of epic – Ramayana.

The example of Oscar Wilde, who transformed himself while being in the prison cell is eye opening. It goes to show that adversity can teach us much if we care to learn from it. The learning impulse should spring from our inner self. The saga of sacrifice coupled with valour exhibited by Chaar Sahibzaadas (Four Princes) the sons of Guru Gobind Singh Maharaj) cannot be forgotten by any right thinking people. They made supreme sacrifices for the noble cause of saving the religious belief of a section of society.

There is one of the best advantages which the adversity brings in its wake. Adversity brings us very close to our Creator. I’ve a personal experience about this. In difficult times, when everybody had left me but only ONE who remained with was my CREATOR MY ISHWAR MY ALLAHA MY LORD hence proving that He is always ready to provide us succor when there is a need.

I view adversity and spirituality interlinked. In spirituality we get the fundamental answers like:

Who I am?

What is the ultimate truth?

Where I shall be after my death?

Is there rebirth after death?

What is Karma and how it can have effect on my life.

Is Moksha (LIBERATION) possible?

All mentioned above including other mystic questions could be meaning answered under the realm of spiritualism and the best course is through prayer, meditation etc.

Contrarily, those who lead a cozy lifestyle and do not go beyond material possessions; which is acquired by any means imaginable also live on this planet. Such people cannot make any difference to the lives of others. They have the habit of living in affluent conditions thus whenever they are subjected to adverse situations due to change of fortunes they wilt under pressure and face an ignoble future.


Am I doing something wrong? 

Hello friends.iam 27yrs old. Iam in love with my guy (who is 28) since 5 yrs. Last year I informed my parents about him. But they refused to even meet him, just because he is from a different caste. My guy did try to meet my parents. But they didnt let him. He did not involve his parents because it would only make matters worse. My parents clearly told my guy (over the phone) that they do not wish to meet him or his parents. This eventually lead to our break up. Since my parents were so adamant, I thought it would be best to part ways. Though the guy did not want to let go.we broke the mean time my parents almost fixed my marriage. Thats when i realised my mistake. Fortunately that match was I cancelled. i patched up with my bf after 8 months. I have once again told my parents about the guy and even now they have the same caste objection. 
I dont know what to do to solve this issue. I love my guy and i want my parents too. Am i wrong? also i go out with my bf for movies and lunch. Is it wrong? Should i stop it?

Best Answer Asker’s Choice

  • Harbans answered 4 years ago
    • Edit

It is important that parents want your well being. They must not have liked your friendly simply because they think you have been brought up in different set of circumstances. It is also possible that your parents must have got investigated about your friends background etc.

Whichever thing it may be, but fact remains, you love this guy. For this, I suggest you again bring up the subject and remove all the misgivings that they may be having. Half your problems will be solved if you show sincerity in your effort. Bring that boy to your parents, despite their not meeting. Involve one of your near relations but inform that relation everything about your relationship and his background and other antecedents. Certainly, there can be a way out. If object is based only on caste based then your parents have to introspect deep and take into account your life and future. You, then, have the final right to act in whatever way you think. But, for heaven’s sake do not take any hasty steps, which may put you and your parents and your boy friends red faced in the eyes of the people at large.

You also venture to meet his parents and convince them to meet yours so as to solve this festering problem. Please think logically, act compassionately that is good for you, your boy friend and the parents at both sides. Compromise solution for your benefit could be the right solution. And, if nothing comes out of the above efforts, you have your life to spend. Act as your heart and mind tell and take the final course.*

The following never be forgotten for a relationship to be lasting:-

  1. Love to be lasting should be both sided.
  2. Compromises on both side is a must. One party compromising and the other doing nothing will not take the two parties anywhere.
  3. For marriage to be successful, it is a must that both understand each others’ viewpoints vis-à-vis parents of boy and girl.
  4. Finally, if nothing works, boys and girl should forge head and have a lasting relationship together with the idea these fellows have their own lives to live and nothing counts much otherwise. And you are not doing anything wrong.

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It is a fact that God incarnates great souls for spreading divine role on His behalf. It is a prime requirement of deluded minds who are immersed in the world of their own making and never realize that their mission in this world is to spread humanity.

Jesus was born in 7 – 2 BC and was crucified in 30-33 AD in Jerusalem on the orders of the Roman prefect, Pontius Pilate. He was born in Nazareth, Galilee to Parents Marry & Joseph. That is why he is also referred to as Jesus of Nazareth. St. Mathew has spoken about the birth:….Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, being interpreted is, God with us.”

The Supreme Lord sends His Messengers on this earth to spread His Message. His teachings are so relevant that there is a definitive imprint of His teachings on the psyche of people and that is why His influence remains centuries after centuries. Those sincere devotees who have attained certain level of spirituality can see the Divine Vision.

Jesus was the one who had won victory against material consciousness. He exists in the hearts and minds of His followers. He said, ‘I do nothing of myself, but as my Father hath taught me.’ Christians including numberless others who have indomitable belief in His preaching shun delusions and follow His ideals. His presence is felt through his teachings. Those who have self realization know that in every speck of cosmos Christ Consciousness exists but only those who have vision can experience this. Christ Consciousness is a part of Cosmic Consciousness should never be lost sight of by us humans.

His teachings are so exhaustive, yet, if we care to follow the ones mentioned below, we can make our life sublime.

  • Jesus Christ preached the importance of having compassion for our fellow beings. He taught that kindhearted feeling should always be there even for all including our enemies:-

Mark 6:34 When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and  he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. And he began to teach them many things.

Colossians 3:12-13  Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved,  compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and,  if one has a complaint against another,  forgiving each other;  as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

  • He is held to be the Son of God, a Messiah or Messenger of God, a charismatic healer:

Matthew 14:14 When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them and healed the sick.

  • Christ preached forgiveness and mercy. He even forgave those who harmed him immensely. No ill-feelings for anyone absolutely that is the message given:

Matthew 6:14-15  For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?  As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.

Daniel 9:9  To the Lord our God belong mercy and forgiveness, for we have rebelled against him

  • Christ spread the message to judge others correctly it is fine if we judge others negatively then we will also be judged by our Creator on the Judgement Day then we have to face the music for every creature’s action is recorded in the consciousness of God.

Matthew 7:1-2  Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and  with the measure you use it will be measured to you.

  • Jesus Christ being a social reformer He had the unique quality of helping those who are suffering – it may be any kind of suffering.

Corinthians 1:3-4  Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

Even for healthy and prosperous family life He had a message (for young women who have to take responsibility to run a family’s affairs):

Titus 2:4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children,




Born to virgin Mary

The loveliest Son of Holiest Spirits of our Lord,

At Bethlehem, the city of David,

A saviour of humanity,

And to spread the fragrance,

Of His message of peace.


Men of wisdom came from places afar,

Mesmerized by this Shining Star,

To witness a holiest event,

Which only sometimes happen,

Angels sing songs so melodious,

Shepherds pay their utmost reverence.


Old in years the two,

 Simeon & Anna saw their ambition fructified,

As they too had a glimpse of the Glorious One,

Brought up in rural town of Nazareth,

His adaptive father Joseph,

Taught Him the art of using,

Tools of a carpenter,

A labour so arduous by any standard,

Resulting in sweating,

By the rays of sun so searing.


The revered God’s Son,

Worked tirelessly in the hot Sun!

Thence as he cometh,

From the waters of Jordan,

A voice so invigorating,

Cometh from Heaven,

‘This is my beloved Son

In whom I am very pleased’. 

Thereafter Jesus went to the backwoods,

Surprise of surprises of all!

To allow Satan to temp Him

To break the back of Satan.


He fasted for days forty,

And vanquished the Satan thence forth,

With eternal will of God in the heaven,

Then brimming with the Holy Sprit,

He lived with the commons,

For three long years.


John recorded Jesus as the Son of God,

Who raised the dead to live again,

Made the blinds to see again,

Lames to walk again,

Demons not to appear again,

Came to the succour of hapless,

During mighty storms. 

With a few loaves and fish,

Made food sufficient for five thousands!

Believe – we have to!

Since He is sent by Him,

As a Saviour,

As His Incarnate,

The All Knowing,

The All Powerful Being.


Then on a Thursday Night,

He meets his followers,

In the city of Jerusalem,

On an occasion so solemn,

He announced,

It is ordained that He may die,

For those He loved so dearly,

And told them to remember,

His association with them,

And also promised,

To come back,

For their sake!

He spent time in the garden of Gethsemane,

Prayed to the Divine Providence.

No case was found against Jesus,

By those who tried Him,

Yet was crucified on Friday,

He departed this life,

For He loved us all,

After when He was dead,

His power was proclaimed,

By happening most unexplained,

On the morn of Sunday,

He rose from the dead,

Appeared to Mary,

And apostles and a huge gathering,

And gave the message of love

Goes to prove

He remains invincible in both the states.


Our Heavenly Lord sends,

His own Love overflowing Messengers,

With Mastery in Spiritual-Vision,

To spread His pious Message to us humans,

Infuse transformation,

And reforming His creations,

So that world-weary practices,

Which corrupt the society at large,

Are weeded out swiftly,

From our midst,

And adopt the ones,

Ordained by our Lord,

With huge sprinkle of enchanting-bountiful Love.


Jesus Christ was sent to us by the Lord Sup0reme,

For our wellbeing and reform,

So that the rust created by old & useless rituals,

Could be erased by mystifying spray of pious ideals and ideas,

Which the Super Soul doles out,

For the gentry at large,

Some may not take these holy ideals,

Thinking these to be far-fetched,

As many did,

When Lord Jesus was with us,

In flesh and blood,

For which He had to suffer pangs,

Fearlessly at the Cross/- crucification

And finally resurrection,

To make us realize that,

The True Son of Lord cannot be done away with,

By anybody – however powerful,

Those individuals be there at the helm,

His preaching will remain enlightening us,

Through Christ Consciousness.


O Lord, bestow us Thy Invaluable CHRISTMAS DAY GIFT,

The precious of all Thy Gifts,

That Thee could only grant,

The coveted gift of peaceful coexistence,

In the whole world by Thy Grace

So that this world could be a better place to live,

A place where there is a prevalence of Eternal Love.






Small-small steps taken with utmost sincerity

And done just differently

Provides sufficient synergy

To our efforts & makes much difference finally

A big leap ahead bereft of any care

Surely produces unpredictable scare

Fall may make us unbalanced

Thus stopping our forward march unhindered.

A child when born
Is unaware of everything that happens around
Till such time
Mother, with her slow but tender touches & nudges

The time tested ones

With a lots of love and care
There is joy even in the child’s tears

Mixed with her own tears of delight

At the slightest prank of the tot
Daily is the fitting moment for new skill learning

Thru’ small-small steps put together.

Then our Lord Divine
Dearest of all

Being an Absolute Potency

And we His marginal potencies

He is ever ready to render succor in our sincere endeavors
Wants nothing but our genuine adulation
This we can shower on our Creator
Not at one go!

But thru small-small doses
One right step at a time – slowly
With righteousness writ large, surely
On each step taken under His care
With the fond notion that nothing goes amiss

When our life’s keys are with our Lord

Small-small steps taken sincerely just count a lot.



If we carry out small things with utmost interest and sincerity besides letting our inner potentials to come into play, then, half the battle is won. The results of these small-small steps add up and bestow huge synergy to our efforts. I’m of the view that these small-small steps slight are slow but push forwards. This is just like a small swallow of food that we take, chew nicely, get digested without creating any digestive problems. Contrarily, if we swallow a big morsel, firstly, we are unable to chew fully, will surely create digestive problems – instead of mitigating our hunger. Surely, no side effects in slow but small steps. No pressures or stressful situations. This is true of job on hand, too. Excessive excitement in handling more than we can handle with felicity produces excessive disappointment when results are not to our likings.

For climbing a steep mountain, we have to take small steps without forgetting that a single wrong and hasty step will jeopardize our further march or may also put full-stop to our chances of becoming a mountaineer for good. Momentum in our life is established when small-small steps, step-by-step engender small-small but sure changes in our own self add-up to make a huge difference ultimately.

This small-small step principle is adopted by the farming community. Firstly, the farmers plough the fields nicely on which seeds are sown besides looking after the natty-gritty of field’s security by ensuring proper fencing besides removing unwanted weeds from time to time. Having planted the seeds, proper watering is needed for sprouting. Put right type of manure with right types of pesticides assures unhindered growth. Then the assistance which the Mother Nature renders in the form of air, water and sun cannot be forgotten. All these small but important steps assure the unhindered growth till harvesting, in all these, the farmer gets utmost satisfaction. In the similar way, we bestow miniscule care and see our offspring growing. What a feeling! In all these, our contribution, coupled with the contribution of people around us make huge difference besides Mother Nature’s gifts.

Meaningful steps at the right time and space count a lot. It has also been seen that a Manager who inspires and motivates subordinates and lauds their small steps towards fructification of project on hand succeeds. For motivation to be of any value, the leader has to be an example for others to follow. Those who desist from taking even small-small steps at a time are disappointed.

Lord Krishna, in Chapter 3 of Bhagwad Gita , has enunciated: ‘Whatever a great man does, the same action is imitated by the common people. The example set by the great men or the standards he sets according to morality, the world follows the same.

If I stop doing my duties, people following me and believing me as their ideal will change their attitude. Society will perish and I will mix up truth and falsehood, create confusion and in the end, cause their destruction.’

The above is true in meditation/prayer, too. Small steps make difference immensely. If we want that our questions are answered by our Creator, we have to offer sincere prayers. Big strides can follow afterwards, when we are confident that our first small steps are in the right direction. Having understood the importance of smaller steps, it is important that we understand the following:-

Knowing self. What are our prime requirements for improvement on daily basis. This may be our physical and social development besides psychological development that is also eventually required. For physical development, food, air and water are a must and for social development contact with our immediate social groups is essential. Contact with other gender too is essential. Psychological development can be ensured by infusing positive traits and negating the negativity through suggestions and personal experiences under the guidance of parents in the childhood and experts, when required afterwards. For this to happen meaningfully, we have to take every step slowly but surely and with sincerity. Any wrong step and in the wrong direction in haste could mess up everything.

Every righteous step put forward is a welcome step forward in achieving our goal. But care ought to be exercised that nothing is done in a huff and consequently mess up everything.

Our Guru/Preacher’s counseling should always be respected to avoid any wrong step forward. But these steps should be in consonance with the will of our Lord – slow but sincere.

Practicing or experiencing the finer points of our gain. We should enjoy all the experiences of our life just calmly and slowly. Let these be forward movement or even slightly backward too. A tectonic shift or paradigm shift to our efforts could only come when we experience the results of our efforts in small-small ways initially and then steadily increase the tempo of our efforts. SPEED AND EASE will be attained when experience just add up. Predictable time-frame for these experiences differ from person to person.




























In Bhagwad Gita (Chapter 1 – 40 ) it has rightly been said:

pradushyanti kulastriyah |
Strīṣu duṣtāsu vārṣnēya
jāyatē varṇasamkaraḥ

Arjun, with huge concern tells Lord Sri Krishna, O Krishna! When sin prevails, the women of the family get polluted, and then from the corruption of womanhood produces unwanted, unworthy children. This will also impact complex system of occupations and communities – the social order besides spreading corruption and bribery.

Corruption is a self perpetrated design by an individual, an organization, a community/society, a country for the purpose of unreasonable benefits for a single individual, organization, a community/society or a country. This benefit could be accrued by adopting sinful, impiety, unethical, immorality, evil, debased of all the negativities put together.

There is no escape route for anybody, any society/community or any country which adopts corrupt practices for garnering corrupt practices. If it is not from law enforcing agencies or the country or the world Recognized Laws then the Natural Laws OR finally the perpetrators cannot escape the retributions of our CREATOR. We are all accountable to Him ultimately.


Administration related corruption. When no file or work gets done without putting wait (of bribe) on it then babus or administrative machinery is found to be involved then we can term it corruption officialdom. There are so many cases where individuals have collected money beyond their known income.

Corruption in families. What happens when one of the spouse (male / female) or both are involved in moral trepidations. In this sort of a scenario whole of the fabric of the family gets impacted.

Government’s Complacency or direct involvement. Scams such as coal scam which happened while allotting coal blocks to different parties on the basis of pecuniary considerations or any other consideration or 2G scam involving politicians and government officials of India undercharging the companies for frequency allocation for pecuniary consideration. Or we know about Bofor gun scam. These sorts of corruption within the Government tarnishes and the image of the country and imperils its position and prestige in the comity of nations.

In many cases the money collected by the individuals or the ministers could stash their money in foreign banks to avoid tax or fearful of being caught red handed. The recent cases of BLACK MONEY deposited outside the country is a stark reality of corruption in high places.

Informal Institutions/organizations. It has been experienced that people trust those who preach religion and if these very people prove to be involved in wrong doings/corrupt practices which are immoral and unethical then there is a problem. This sort of a corruption gives a real bad name to the informal institution or the organization and general masses feel disillusioned. There are examples of known people involved in immoral acts, even as low as sexual related scandalsws, while preaching morality.

Individuals, organizations or a society involved could be compared to a corrupt data that is secured in a computer database but is corrupted by the virus thus making the system dysfunctional in the process.

Corruption is said to be done when one resorts to or adopts unethical methods in order to garner pecuniary gains and in that process breaks the laws of country concerned. Besides moral corruption, when one adopts immoral practices for pecuniary gains. This method could be immoral tarnishing the very character of the individual concerned.

Corruption has obviously taken a toll on our society. If we term it a slow poison, it will not be a wrong thing. Everybody wants to be materially prosperous. Some adopt short route, in the process, just hoodwinking the rules and regulations in vogue.

We do not get good candidates to represent us because there is often a sale and purchase of candidates while choosing them, though with some exception. Those with power and pelf get upper hand. Candidates who actually have ability in real sense of terms get booted out initially itself and the ones with influence in plenty with plentiful money just get voted in. What can we expect from the ones who have come to represent us by purchasing their tickets? Well, it is not a rocket science not to be understood. Then when corruption takes a hydra headed snake form, we blame others. We ourselves had chosen those who are representing us then how others are responsible for it all!

In the offices, general people have to grease the palms of the person(s) concerned for getting their jobs done. For instance, even in tender bidding, rules and regulations are given a sweetest good bye. Those with influence at the right places get their bids passed with even less competency for acquiring the same.

Various scams which are coming to light now have taken the corruption and the corrupt practices to another dimension.

Even the religious places too are not immune to it. People at the helm furtively siphon off the offerings for their own use.

I am of the opinion that some fear of our CREATOR is created that the money created through illegal and corrupt practices, if used for upbringing of the children, will have ill effects on their growth and development. And this is so? Then I think some wise thinking may dawn and the corruption may decline.

Or let the law of the land made stringent and practical that those who resort to corrupt practices, are made to face consequences for their acts, then also something tangible could be expected.

We ourselves have to introspect that how this menace of corruption has to be bridled lest it eats the very edifice on which our society rests.


Accountability means call to question the acts of omissions and commissions. When one has resorted to unethical means garnering undue gratifications/profits he/she is accountable to his/her action. It also provides moral or a legal framework to take the individual to task. The individual concerned has to shoulder blameworthiness and is/are liable for legal action. Black money earned through corrupt practices has to be accounted for. `

While individuals are responsible for their actions and could be dealt according to the law of the land, if found to have resorted to corrupt practices, political party could be punished by the people in the elections if that party does not translate their promises into tangible results. Or a political party commits scams for getting pecuniary gains.

There is a social accountability if an individual adopts corrupt practices. He / she could be orchestrated by the society.

Accountability is also based on moral/ethical trepidation. When we break rules and conventions, we have to face the music of our misdemeanor. It follows that whatever an individual, a society or a country does is accountable for the undoing. In parliamentary system of Government legislatures are accountable to the people of the country.

The administration could be held responsible if they do not follow the laid down norms of the official rules and regulations.

The menace of corruption if controlled through strongest but enforceable legislations could bode well for the countries concerned. Now is the time when the iron is hot. A mass media and voices of the sagacious masses should stand with those who want to eradicate this scourage. Continue reading UGLY FACE OF CORRUPTION & ACCOUNTABILITY THEREOF




We generally associate shallow with low or thin – it may be associated with individual or a thing. Shallowness could be with respect to water level, shallow breathing due to panic etc. Thin level of water also is an indication of shallowness of water. Shallowness could be construed as lacking in physical depth. It has been seen that a place where the water is shallower, the bulge is seen higher and steeper – thus taking a form of familiar sharp-crested wave shape. This results in erosion of soil when it touches the soil with a force.

This analogy fits well with the bent of mind of a person with shallow mentality – narrowness in thought percepts but forceful in tall-talks. A person with petty or one dimensional mentality who is in the habit of making exaggerated claims in regard to his proficiency, vision, accomplishment acumen et al but when put to use proves hallow in everything – no penetrative know-how about things he/she professes. An example of ‘Jack of all trades but master of none’ fits nicely with this sort of an individual. Seemingly, sharp on theory but less on delivery could be best described for this sort of a fellow. Also, this sort of an individual has single dimensional mindset besides having less depth in intellect, emotion or gyan (knowledge). He can neither help himself nor is of any help for others ultimately.

This shallowness in a person is in my views a self inflicted psychological tag that a person may have got due to his own style of functioning. It is because every individual who is created by our Creator has special characteristics which nobody other than that individual could fathom to have. Reasons for having this shallowness could be many. It may be due to situation that individual was placed beyond his control that that person could not reach the level in sync with the norms of the society which could be termed as deep one thus earning a tag of shallow.

It is opined that if an individual determines and wants to breach this ‘shallowness’ and reach to deeper state of existence could do so through personal efforts and sincere Karmic actions. We should not nurture a preconceived notion that a particular person cannot be refined or cannot change his preconceived notions. By broadening the outlook on day to day interactions and not narrowing our thought percepts that we can get rid of this feeling. He could if willingness that springs from within self. It should never be forgotten that every mind has the symptoms of growth but we have to make sincere efforts to exploit our inner depth of knowledge that we all possess amply. A man of action does not deviate from his course of action. This has been given In Chapter 6 of Bhagwad Gita, it has been emphasized: As a lamp in a windless place does not flicker, so the Yogi, whose mind is firm, remains steady in the meditation on the self.

A person with   intelligence, maturity and strong emotionally, compassionate in disposition and having knack to discriminate between good and bad is a person who could face challenges of life squarely. He is a ‘guy’ having all the characteristics of compatibility in any situation that person is placed. May it be good or bad. This sort of a person has a vast sense of accommodation for his fellow beings and is easily accessible. He could be termed as a person with pretty deep sense of responsibility and is just antithesis to anything that shallow person possesses.

In contrast, person with low esteem of oneself, not making effort to improve, viewing everything with his own narrow prism, a frog in the well type of a person can also improve. For this to happen, the person concerned firstly have to change his own mental outlook, here psychological alertness is called for not an attitude which limits our horizon.

An individual with shallow mentality has the following drawbacks:-

  1. Low self esteem but professes to be having more.
  2. One dimensional mind or petty mentality bereft of any maturity in thought or action.
  3. Interferes with others’ matter on any or all pretexts.
  4. Have no penetrating knowledge on anything.
  5. Narrowness in thoughts.
  6. Sharp on theory but hallow on delivery.
  7. An person with shallow mentality is buried under the weight of his own contradictions.
  8. Shallowness may be due to some adverse environment at home or the place that person is living.
  • We could broaden the outlook and bring positivity in life, hollowness or shallowness in life will just evaporate.
  • Shallow mentality could be refined if sincere efforts are made by an individual with ample grace from our Lord.




Are people happy or sad by nature ?


If a happy person gets isolated due to some reason… And then repeatedly subjects himself to melancholy… Like depressive thoughts… Sad memories, incidents… For a length of time… Would he become sad ??

If a sad person gets into the company of awesome happy people, is too busy to be sad, too occupied with them… Forcefully enjoying… Letting go.. Getting wasted… Learning to laugh at things… Would he become happy ??

Or is it in a person’s nature to be sad or happy no matter what the circumstances ??

I ask this because i am a melancholic pessimist… Have always been this way.. I take things people say way too seriously and would find drama or offence in the least significant things…. But ive tried to change… Its difficult but maybe not impossible…

I wanted to know… About other people… Are you all happy or sad by nature or just responsive to situations ??

Best Answer Asker’s Choice

  • Harbans answered 3 years ago
    • Edit

A person is sad or happy in sync with the mindset of that person concerned. It is on the spur. There are people who have made it their habit to exhibit sadness without any perceptible reason whatsoever. But happiness is a positive frame of mind / state of mind. To be happy, that happiness has to spring from inside of self. In other words, It is innate. It is not merely showing on the surface of your face but comes from within. A person with a control over his senses does not allow the sadness invade his privacy. The outer influences do not influence his/her inner thought percepts. It is just like hot outside and cool inwards. Whatever hotness occurs outside the body just is alleviated by inner coolness. Whenever something adverse invades us, there are sufficient inner defences to ward off the sense of negative feeling and dilute it and eliminate it altogether. This quality to remain happy internally comes with experience and perseverance and with God’s grace. Meditative concentration is also the answer for equanimity both in happy and sad moment.

Yes, our company of friends influences us. If we are in the company of happy people who despite their adversities remain calm and self possessed. They never are swayed by untoward situations. If we care to read their behavior and mindset, we shall learn much from such people and question us. Why these people are happy and why I cannot be like them? With this sort of a positive thought, we can alleviate our sad disposition and live with equanimity thus ‘melancholic pessimist’ state of mind could be transformed into contented optimistic state of mind.

Man is not happy or sad by nature, though a person’s nature sometimes is influenced. One makes it a habit to imbibe the characteristic by his own free will. Nobody can force any sort of habit on us. If we are determined to be happy by all means, sure enough, nothing can stop us from doing so. And if we are in the habit of comparing ourselves with others irrationally, we are sure to face the music for it all.

Thus, happiness and sadness depends on the individual’s capacity to take as he/she likes and react.


Thus nobody is happy or sad by nature but if we want to be happy nobody in this world can make us sad.


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Asker’s Rating & Comment




  1. How do you know he’s the right guy to marry?


I only want answers from people who are still married and happy or people who never been married. The reason I’m asking because I see so many divorces now days, makes me wonder if there’s even a point to get married.




Best Answer:  You are right that there are so many divorces now-a -days. The main reason for these divorces going northward is non-adjustment of the couples. These are attributable to various reasons like financial stringency, non-compatibility due to not understanding the needs of other partner, maladjustment due to excessive pressures from other members of the household (if in the joint family) or any other local unresolved issues. Here, the fault lies especially with the boy who does not foretell everything that is worth telling to his future wife which becomes cause of heartburn after marriage.

Both the spouses should try to understand the needs and aspirations of each other as each of them are important cogs/constituents of marriage to last or lost. My experience tells me that girls are bestowed with more patience/tolerance by Mother Nature as they have to move to new set of environs and have to adopt all the norms governing the household of her in-laws, leaving her own parents. She has to accept the change with grace, slowly but surely. Husband should also assist her meaningfully. Here a balance between tact and diplomacy are must. If there is adjustment between spouses, then half the battle is won. If it is a joint family then husband can confide in his spouse the need and aspiration of each members; here again others members too should understand the condition of a new member (the girl) and help her adjust, teach her the norms of the family. In this sort of a scenario, there is no problem. It is the prime duty of the husband to let her assimilate in the family but slowly. Nothing happens in haste. Give and take in a relation is a must. It is not a one way traffic. In the nuclear families (husband & wife or children) adjustment could be ensured when equal respect for each other is there but it is lacking then God is the only savior since there is nobody in the family to make them round.

If still difference on some small pin-pricks persist, these should be left to the great leveler – ‘time’. It should never be forgotten that time is a great healer. In the meanwhile your in-laws may also understand you fully and try to adjust according to your perception in life. But this sort of condition / contingency will arise when the girl has tried to adjust according to their outlook. But a cautionary note: do not be dumb driven cattle. You can express your views sincerely and trust me these would be respected if found palatable. Nobody is that inconsiderate, except a few who are fastidious and may something and act otherwise. Yet in that scenario the best thing is to adopt a wait and watch.

Finally, when each of the spouses think family as a sacred unit and adopts guiding principle of forgive and forget each others’ faults then marriage as an institution just lasts. Never sleep you’re your problems. Just discuss and get rid of these rather than creating a black-hole  still wider. Husbands should never ever forget that the families where women are respected God lives there only. Total success of a marriage to be successful is total commitment of values by both the spouses.

Thus he is the right person who has the above characteristic.  World is full of people of this nature. Do not get disappointed. Just introspect and proceed further.

Harbans · 4 years ago