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BREACH OF TRUST

30 Jul

TRUST

 

Trust is not a product

Which could be picked up

From the shelf of a shop

Or could be purchased

After a bid so high

Or lofty ideals and ideas

That one posses in abundance

Nor it could be cultivated

Through a wishful thought.

We’ve to invest in time and energy

To develop solid trust or confidence

Which can withstand in stoic silence

Any stormy blizzards or tsunamis

Of unpredictable ‘time’  

Once fully matured

This trust should be fructified

And sanctified by the grace of Almighty God.

Trust developed have to be maintained

By fulfilling the vows made

At the Altar

Or while taking rounds

Around the fire so sacred

Sincerely fulfilling the commitments publically made

Like sharing responsibilities sincerely

By showering loving care for each other so generously

Sharing joyous and unpleasant occasions

With unflinching love and affection

Including a feeling of compassion for known and unknown

With heart full of courage and strength

Thus earning name for righteous deeds

Which may help smooth sailing in life indeed

Thus establishing mutual confidence and trust for lifelong.

Similar is the case with business partnership

For the agreement agreed upon during making business deed

Have to have the stamp of respect of all concerned

For the ongoing business to succeed

If trust is breached by an unscrupulous party

The question of business success is doubtful, surely.

In the workplace, most certainly

Maintenance of trust is of utmost necessity

Have to preserve sanctity of privacy

Above every other considerations

But if somebody breaches the confidence

That person is the black sheep for us all to see.

  

Trust is a huge phenomenon in our lives. I believe, trust comes with a huge amount of investment in time and energy. It is just not developed in a jiffy or through wishful thinking. There a huge amount of emotions involved in this emotional thinking. But it should be kept in mind that too much of attachment for anything or anybody brings with it huge amount of accountability to maintain it.  In our life one should never develop too much of attachment with material possession or relation.

In Bhagwad Gita it has rightly been said: The worker who is free from all material attachments and false ego, who is enthusiastic and resolute and who is indifferent to success or failure, is a worker in the mode of goodness.

But that worker who is attached to the fruits of his labor and who passionately wants to enjoy them, who is greedy, envious and impure and moved by happiness and distress, is a worker in the mode of passion.

Trust is strength of mind based entirely on firm belief. Determination is related to time. Time is not fixed, it is in flow – duration. In duration, subject to change or can vary as time passes. When displeasure causes break down of self confidence, it is caused by deep attachment. Attachment results in expectation and expectation, ignoring the change, results in making the smooth sailing in relationship hard. We expect others to keep remembering their responsibilities towards us but without least doing in return. When we expect good conduct from others, we have to reciprocate in the similar manner. It should always be remembered that nothing works in isolation. Life  is not a one way traffic. Trust once developed has to be assiduously maintained and should be kept above every other consideration.

When somebody breaches our trust then, sure enough, there would be unpredictable tremors in our lives because our emotions are involved in this. We, in our lives. with pulls and pressures of our own, get swayed – may be due to our own weaknesses or may be due to our own compulsions or contradictions. We feel cheated whenever somebody breaks our confidence or breaches our trust. Some may say, they do not feel any pain or they do not feel anything when somebody breaks our confidence but, I think, that is too much of an expectation from humans. We are having emotions which, if taken to its limits, will explode and impact our lives.

Breach of trust by a known person is simply unbearable, we lose the bond of friendship instantly. When our relationship is superficial then if somebody breaks our trust there is not much emotional upsets. But emotional investments and then breach of trust bring with it agony which may last for life span itself.

Similarly, while we reach to some understanding about a business partnership between the partners, it is made explicitly clear to stick to the charter of our agreement before starting any enterprise jointly. For the success of this enterprise, it is a must that the parties concerned remain working within the framework of the agreement reached. On the other hand, if one of the partners breaks this agreement and works unethically for taking control of the business by deceit. This is a breach of contract or agreement thus amounts to breach of trust.

In our married life too, on the eve of marriage ceremony, the priest reads out the vows the bride and the grooms have to make commitment before actual ceremony. Like sharing of responsibilities,  loving each other, filling heart with courage and strength, showering single minded pure love and devotion and looking after the children to the best of their capabilities, participation in all the sacred rituals including vows for righteous behavior, prayer to the Almighty for prosperity including sharing of good and bad times together, to fill each others heart with joy and finally to offer unflinching love and friendship including a wish that their marriage may last forever.

If anyone breaks the vows committed, then that is the breach of vows of trust made in presence of kith and kin and sacred fire. Trust is developed and firmed up after passage of time, it is not developed overnight. But when it is developed, then we have to be very careful lest a small flame may ignite and destroy the edifice constructed over a period of time. A little breach even will undo what we have aspired for and attachment just shattered. We’ve to be careful lest we go haywire and spoil what is created. If one spouse does something which is detrimental to the smooth conduct then sure enough that relationship is sure to doom. Then it is but natural that the person who is duped will feel pain.

It should never be forgotten that when have invested huge reserve of our emotions, we develop attachment and such an insincere act leaves us shattered and makes us look at everyone with suspicion. Whilst the act of betrayal is a fait accompli, one needs to take this as a learning lesson. Forgive and forget is what is recommended, but for a human being it is easier said than done. These are the bitter lessons that life teaches and one can only treat it as a bad experience, learn ones lesson and get on with life!

The Trust is breached when the time is bad. It is said that it is not the fault of others because we never take our own account in the assessment. We only blame other. The point arises why should one breach the trust. We can also say that breach of trust could be resorted to by a person who is egoistic and does not keep promises.

Though many times we felt that we are deceived or lost our trust, then also we must try to forgive people. Forgiveness is the quality inside a human being, which tends himself / herself near to God. So we must learn to forgive others, who did any mistake or breaches our trust. But if again and again the same happens, then that is done knowingly, so better to be apart from that fellow. Nothing more to elaborate, I believe all could understand my point of view. Thanks.

Yes this is akin to treachery, utter violation of faith which might lead to the sad demise of mutual trust, reciprocity, freindliness and ultimate break-up of a long relationship and parting of the ways. In a reality, this is perfidy, disloyalty and faithlessness towards the confidant.

he very first thing , though hard in such circumstances, is to analyse the reason why he or she has done it. Then one could be more careful and right in determining the next step, which should be to forget what happened and move on !

What others do or will do, we have no control on that BUT we have all the control on what we do and will do. Let anyone breach the trust in me but I should not breach the trust in myself. Trust Self

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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4 Comments

Posted by on July 30, 2016 in Inner Thoughts

 

4 responses to “BREACH OF TRUST

  1. jacquelineobyikocha

    July 30, 2016 at 4:47 pm

    We work hard to earn it and keep it.

     
    • Harbans

      July 31, 2016 at 4:37 am

      It is a fact, trust is developed with a lot of difficulty, once cultivated, it has to be kept through concerted efforts for living a peaceful life. :))

       
  2. derrickjknight

    July 30, 2016 at 5:16 pm

    Sound as ever, Harbans. I also believe that, based on our childhood experience, we approach situations and relationships with basic trust or basic mistrust (Erikson’s first stage of psychological development). Thus we go into these with an open heart and mind, or filled with fear and suspicion.

     
    • Harbans

      July 31, 2016 at 4:34 am

      Thanks sir. If child is given right sort of education on value system and how to maintain trust of others then most of our problems would melt in thin air. Question is; how best to practice it ourselves. In fact ‘open heart and mind’ philosophy is helpful i.e. to adopt the policy of forget and forgive. Regards

       
 
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