Q. Why do we get the feeling that everybody is laughing at us?


Why do we get the feeling that everybody is laughing at us?

In real life, moot point stands out, we tend to measure ourselves not because of own standing, understanding besides level of achievement but what others think about ourselves. I attribute this perceptive factually fallacious in real sense of terms but it happens in real sense of terms.  

In essence, there are different types of people. There are ones who are introvert and there are extroverts then there are people who are excessively self-conscious. Self-conscious ones  are very touchy or temperamental. Anything or everything which happens in their lives, they’ll react and will not just keep silent. They are compulsive reactive people and with reactive tendency they cannot tolerate any criticism of anybody. Even a normal healthy criticism spoils their day or just a laugh or smirk will adversely affect their demeanor. It should be kept in mind that we do not get appreciations always. Sometimes, somewhere, we’ve to face adverse situation.

Nobody disputes the fact that we’ve to be self-conscious but it too has certain limit. With self-awareness, we shall be able to know our self-potential but of course our weaknesses too. Just eliminate those weaknesses to the limit possible. While we have confidence, we conduct ourselves appropriately in any situation. Always bear in mind that nobody has time and resources to waste on others.  Just perform your duties, as assigned, and forget what others think  about you.

Never ever take any sort of criticism seriously. May be the person who is laughing at you wants to distract you from the project you are undertaking and does not want you to focus on the project at hand. Also, if somebody browbeats you, laughs at you, it means that particular person does not like your growth in life. Or worst still, may be that person is mentally sick and requires psychiatric’s  help.

Also, why to blame others for your drawbacks? You think others are laughing at you means there is something lacking in you itself and it is about time that you make amends in your attitude and behavior pattern and be confident about yourself.

Then we should always keep in mind that in whatever way we are created by our Creator, we should love ourselves; have the self-esteem to the best of our ability. In that self-belief, have self-affirmation.

If you are conscious about your looks, then we should always read about the lives of great men who changed the very idea that it does not merely the looks which count but their performance which makes huge impression. We should always realize that all those who created something different were not that handsome or beautiful. We have the fine example: like Mick Jagger (the Rolling Stone), Susan Boyle (The International Singing Sensation), Sir Winston Churchill , Napoleon Bonaparte (French Emperor), Hellen Keller and many more examples who made a name and fame for themselves despite their one drawback or other. These people were not self-conscious but were fully confident about their inner potential and made a huge difference.

More so, if you think that you are not having adequate education to impress others and that brings you lack of confidence. In that case, you should read about the life of Thomas Alva Edison. He had limited formal education – had to leave his education pursuits to work. But before his death, he had 1093 patents on his name for light and power, phonography, telegraphy, storage batteries etc. Such is the power of inner potential. Those who realize it, do not care about the extraneous things. They do not care about anything – somebody may laugh at them or not they care damn and go on in their lives.

The following aspects should be taken into account for making us confident and self-assertive:-

  • Have self-confident to face any situation at all times.
  • In life, we may come across different people, some may be of your liking while others may not be of your liking but you will have to adjust with everybody.
  • If anybody criticizes us, introspect the point on which you are criticized and try improving that aspect. And if the criticism is far-fetched and with ulterior agenda driven then just ignore it and do not lose your sleep over this.
  • Just think that nobody approbation at all times. There are occasions when we shall be laughed at or down-graded but we should not take this criticism very seriously. Let go is the only alternative.
  • Stay cool and confident at any situation and never be reactive. When somebody is making your reactive or angry, it means the person concerned is controlling you.
  • Your thinking that you are being laughed at may be wrong impression so it should be taken as a bad dream and forgotten as such. Let that person laugh or weep, it is not your business to stop him/her not to do so. If and what on this, may create problem rather than solving it.
  • When you are mere laughed at should not spoil your composure since in life there are occasions when you’ll  meet such contingencies but you should not be overly conscious about it all. Just take it coolly. Life does not stop here. It just continues. Laughing or weeping hardly makes difference.




The duly constituted drafting committee with impeccable track record and integrity presented the first draft of Constitution of India on 4th November 1947 and subsequently signed the prepared Constitution of the union on 24th January 1950 by the National Assembly while it came into effect with effect from 26th January 1950. This day was chosen because of its own importance –  being the  anniversary of Purna Swaraj Day (26th Jan 1930). This empowered the general masses to choose their own Government of their choice besides conferring the rights and duties and other important aspects of governance.


Whilst India won its independence

From the bondage – the most repressive one

On 15th  August 1947

This we got through violent and non-violent means

In which countless people made supreme sacrifices.

Free India was not having constitution of its own

A drafting committee was constituted

Which gave its first draft report 4th November1947

Consisting men of impeccable record

The National Assembly put their indelible stamp

On the constitution so diligently prepared

On 24 January, 1950

And came into force on 26 January 1950

Merging with the spirit of the anniversary of Purna Swaraj Day

26th  January 1930, a historic day – we doubtlessly say

Representing the true spirit of independence

Conferring power to its people to elect own Government of choice

And many more rights but also their duties

And indirectly govern themselves!

Dr. Rajendra Prasad took oath

The first President of free India/Bharat

Unfurled the National Flag at Irwin Stadium.

Military might of the land is showcased at Rajpath

Here our para-military forces too show their contribution

Through their smartly dressed parade.

Gallantry awards conferred to the bravest of braves

Some fortunate get the same by themselves

While others get these posthumous,

From the President of India,

Their Supreme Commander.

The cultural diversity of different regions

 Too are the other attractions

A rainbow of diversity indeed!

The other States of the Union too are not left behind

This is the beauty of our republic.

My wish-list for the next Republics is listed below:-

Every Indian should Respect Constitution

 First and foremost wish is that all Indians should respect the Constitution and the contents contained in it as a sacred document especially so the rights, besides this, the duties of the citizenry have to be followed / obeyed threadbare by all without bias. In other word, the Constitution of a country is sacrosanct document, containing all the parameters of good governance and should command respect and respect from all its citizens.

A Corruption Free Society

 It is my fond hope that there should a dawn of corruption free society and those assigned the task of governance and general masses, in whatever tasks they are working (lower or higher) perform their job assigned/chosen with impeccable commitment and sagacity besides upholding the integrity of the country. There should also be zero tolerance of corruption and also corrupts get quick justice for their nefarious designs. No status or material possessions should come in the way of corruption free society. Here Lok Pal Bill/Lok Ayukta’s dictum should be the guiding dictate for dealing with corrupts who are eating into the vitals of our society.

Respect for Women

Unless until we give due respect to women as mother/sister/daughter/wife or friend, we cannot call ourselves as civilized society. It should be without consideration to nationality (I want my country respect women without consideration to any bias as we have seen in many instances. My wish is that my country respect all women without any discrimination whatsoever.

Economic Growth / Strength

 In the international arena, those societies which have got economic clout are held in high esteem and their say is always respected even in renowned world forums. This economic growth does not just come about without concerted efforts on the part of the Government and the general masses. I wish that the next Republic comes when the Government fulfills its vision and mission to upgrade our economy globally. Growth and development should be all inclusive one. All the sectors of economy i.e. industrial; agricultural; infra etc should grow side by side for an overall pump-priming effect on the people in general.

Human Resources Development

 We are proud of our Republic since 65% of the people are below 35 years of age. This human resource should be exploited to the hilt and should not be left to be frittered away by a few corrupt individuals. For this to happen, it is a must that this huge segment of our society gets opportunity for better training/skill and help lift the country from the present stature to the stature of high growth. This is possible with growth in Research & Development for better results in all sphere especially technological development and IT Sector which could go north-ward which merit and talent are given more credence.

People’s Representatives and Governance

 This is my fondest hope and aspiration that the members chosen by my countrymen fulfill their assigned tasks with aplomb without resort to populist rhetoric’s as has been resorted to recently –  a  few days back by the personages holding responsible chairs. This over jealous vigilante attitude is highly regrettable. People at high places should know the rules of governance and stick to the fructify policies on war footings rather than half hearted approach. The people’s representatives should, in other words, act responsibly besides performing their political dharma.

Defence of the Land is of Prime Importanc

While we see the current preparedness in military; it is important that we remain updated in defence preparedness i.e. all the wings of armed forces; Army, Air Force & Navy should get equitable and technologically updated weaponry, hardware and software. We have to keep our borders and coastal area secure and for this to happen it is a important  that India becomes self-sufficient in defence related equipment and do not remain dependent on others. For this our Research and Development (DRDO, ISRO & other important units) will have to  chip in to help in this direction. For this self-reliance is a must in this sector.

Spiritual Onward March

 Over and above the above cited subjects, I am sanguine that our development cannot be so incisive without our spiritual growth and development. Whatever course we adopt, of whatever religion we follow, we should try to seek Him for our liberation (Moksha) besides performing our daily day to day routines.




God is so kind on us all

He discriminates none

Provides us three elements

That too free of any costs involved!

Fire, water and air, so fresh at that

Which are the best forms of energy

For all living beings on earth & even beyond

Without which living beings cannot have any existence

Even for a limited period of time.

Our body is a powerhouse of energy

We can utilize this one for creating things of beauty

Add to the reserve of our knowledge base

By obeying the Laws of Mother Nature

And the laws of society we are part

Disobeying both

Leads to leakage in our energy cycle

Disobeying Nature’s laws

By cutting trees or by polluting air and water

Can impact our energy severely .

Also, not obeying the norms set by society

Or following ways so steeped in negativity

With impunity

Can drain/sap our life’s inner sap.

Following positively oriented life

Can provide ad-on to our already existing energy

Which could be used for life’s variety of activities

For others to appreciate

And for us to be proud of our own creation

Of course, with the grace of own Creator.


Essentially, while we transact any job, we require adequate force or power which makes us to get-up-and go in anything we do. For crystallizing that power, and to add to that power, we need to have inner resolve and will to face inner and outer pressures. In other words, the energy or liveliness to face any pressure in life comes from within us. A determined mind makes huge difference here since we deplete our latent energy in negative Karma such as anger, fear, jealousy, rancor, hate, arrogance  etc. All these negative actions of ours willy-nilly sap our energy and make us powerless to face any challenge that comes in our life; thus making us helpless when it is needed the most. We must have observed the expressions on a person with anger, it adversely affects not only that person’s energy but also his power to think rationally. We can term this anger as a big-hole from which our energy leaks. While we are seething in anger, we just deplete the precious energy we are possessing in us. It is not mere anger there are also other negative agents which deplete our positive energy.


The vast amount of energy which we possess could be utilized productively if we do not waste the same in useful creative pursuits. The first crack, if plugged in the initial stages itself, will make huge difference in having sufficient energy in us to deal with any contingency,. And if a small crack when remain unattended, it will grow to be a big outlet which cannot be plugged easily, it goes uncontrolled. We must have seen how a small leak in a water dam, if not plugged in time, could become uncontrolled big hold, emptying the dam and causing irreparable damage thereafter giving credence to the saying: a stitch in time saves nine. It requires a lot of energy and willpower to control that wide open hole.

Fact remains, when gaping-hole is plugged with personal determination or with the help of some well-wishers, then, we can conserve the energy and this energy could be meaningfully used for creative jobs. The antidote for removing these leaks is by adopting positive thoughts in our daily life activities. These positively oriented thoughts include; compassion, empathy, kindness, tolerance, patience, humility, etc. These can work as curing balm and help plug the leaks rampant in the form of any negative thoughts. These leaks are in the form of anger, jealousy, envy, resentment, animosity, etc.


It has been experienced that when somebody with a positive frame of mind enters our space, our inner energy gets boost due to that person’s presence. On the other hand, a person with gloom and doom write large on his/her face will spread painful emotion and lackluster energy in the atmosphere.


Human resource is one of the best forms of energy which, if utilized meaningfully, could have multiplying affect on the growth and development of a country. Meaning when talented people, based solely on merit, are made to head the vital sectors of the economy including Human Resources and Education, then,  we can have multiple growth and development in any society. Brain drain of the talented people could sap that energy from the country concerned.

In politics too, positive energy helps a lot. When politicians are in positive frame of mind, they spread good-will and frame policies which are inclusive in nature for the welfare of all without discrimination.


It has been experienced that if we lead a spiritual oriented life, we shall endeavour to maintain balance in our life in any contingency.  By this, we cultivate the habit of appreciating beauty, love-,  more love springs up in our midst, there is blossoming of sensitive energy in us, there also is existence of compassion/empathy and pain for others’ suffering and above all creativity too dawns. This also changes the anger, fear, greed and hate into sensitive feelings without being judgmental about it all.

All these changes help in conserving the energy in us.

It has been observed that law of conservation of energy says: Energy can neither be created nor destroyed, rather, it could be transformed from one form to another. Meaning potential energy could be transformed to kinetic energy etc. It can also be said that our positive energy could also be changed to negative energy and vice versa. In what degree we want to change our negative energy into positive depends on us only.

Our body is powerhouse of energy but need is to use this energy in positive pursuits; for creative purpose. We can enhance our inner energy by our positive thoughts and actions. On the other hand negative orientation sap our latent energy. The following should be kept in mind for adding to our energy:-

Forgive and forget. It has been experienced that we fritter our energy by keeping some incident in our mind which keeps us tied down on something unproductive. Then fears of things which may or may not happen, on anger, jealousy on others’ good fortune and other negative pursuits resulting in sapping of our energy. This energy could be conserved and utilized on some productive and creative pursuit

Remain happy. We all are aware, in life, we face ups and downs. When hay tidings are there, we feel elated whereas when something negative, we feel very low in spirits. This weakens the existing energy in us besides becomes a roadblock in our further progress in our life.

No moodiness. When we do not have control over our mind and senses, we become very sensitive even on a slightest pretext. I have observed that even the people who call themselves educated fall prey to this moodiness. This adversely tells upon our health and wellness.

Thanks Giving. Whenever somebody does something for us, we should express our thanks to the person concerned. We should also thank God for giving us everything including all the natural bounties without which our survival is not possible. Just a thank will lift our spirits.

Exercise your mind. We have to exercise control on our mind and the senses so that whatever we transact is within the natural laws, laws of the land including the norms set by the society. Working this manner, we shall have positive orientation in our feelings and thereby our pos6tive energy too would be lifted upwards.

Detached mentality. We should always bear in mind that whatever happens, happens for good. In this BHAGWAD GITA SONG should always be kept in mind:

Whatever has happened has happened for the good

Whatever is happening is also for good

Whatever shall happen, shall also be good

What have you lost that you cry for?

What did you bring that you have lost?

What did you create that was destroyed?

What you have taken, has been from here

What has been given has been given here

What belong to you today, belonged to someone else yesterday

And will be someone else tomorrow

Change is the law of Universe.

Remain in present moment. Most of us just remain glued to the past or worry about the future. The past will not be revisited again and the future nobody can predict. Therefore, we should not lose our present moment in reverie about the past or future though some of the past experiences could be of value to us.

Love and smile. Love and be loved besides spreading dividing smile make a huge difference in our own spirits.

Do not dwell in negativism. Many a times we are engulfed with unfounded fears. If anything has to happen, we cannot do anything about it rather we can protect ourselves from a happening if we are having impression of facing those spetre of fear when it actually comes. To disorient ourselves before an actual happening just takes away our energy. Negatively oriented thoughts puts us in dire straits and weakens our resolve to face the situation as it comes.

Live a spiritual oriented life. While we lead spiritual oriented life, we do our duties with sincerity, deal honestly with others, lead a compassionate life, feel pain while others feel so and above all we love, pray & meditate to our Creator  and thank Him for everything that He has graced us.. It has also been seen that living in spiritual oriented lifestyle add zeal and zest in our life and we lead a purposeful life full of care for the needy.


If experience is any guide, then we can vouch say the importance of freedom in the following aspects:-

  • Freedom of thoughts and actions thereof does not mean to have freedom to trample the hapless people or impinge on their fundamental rights enshrined in the constitution.
  • Real freedom comes into being when we enjoy the fruits of action in the atmosphere of freedom bereft of any coercion or pressure from outside.
  • Real freedom in thoughts and actions comes when we remain within the confines of our limits; my freedom of action ends where somebody spheres of influence starts.
  • In our homes, in our formal and informal institutions, we’re constrained to remain within some norms set by these institutions. Here total freedom means prevalence of chaos and confusion in the society.
  • If at all we’ve to seek freedom, it is from ego-centric tendencies from our within us for living a balanced life.
  • Freedom, for all intends and purposes should be given right direction, unfettered freedom leads to anarchy and lawlessness.
  • Too much of freedom can be disastrous for overall growth and development. Checks and balances serve the purpose of establishing the rule of law.
  • Freedom to make difference hugely dawns when we enjoy our freedom while respecting the freedom of others.
  • It is in SPIRITUALITY wherein a complete surrender is essential in order to establish connectivity with God. In other words, we’ve to orient our thoughts according to the scriptural knowledge contained in different religious texts; it may be be religious texts of Christianity, Muslim, Hinduism, Sikhism etc.
  •  I take freedom as a necessity in our life but limitless freedom blocks of balanced growth and development because it could create authoritative tendencies in us.


When we think in free atmosphere

And act on that thought without let or hindrance

We surely put add-on

To our creative power

Since when hurdles

Are erected on our sincere efforts surely

Get bogged down severely.

We’re born without any fetters

But after our birth on this earth

We remain dependent on others for our survival

For food and several needs

Followed by our learning

In school, college, university or other Institutions

Then we get the employment

According to our aptitude

Here too we are not free to act

As we like or detest

We’ve to work under some rules and regulations

Of organization we are engaged.

In society too we have to remain within norms

Followed by the society in general

Otherwise we shall face the outcome so dismal 

Hence in life, we’ve layers of obstructions.

Factually, only in spiritual plane

Surrender necessarily is considered as the highest traits

Here liberty of thought and action is curtailed

It has to work in sync with truth given in the scriptures 

Which are based on the practical experiences

We have to surrender our worldly wishes

For eternal peace and bliss.

In spiritual plane

We’ve to dissolve ourselves

For getting Moksha

The liberation from births and deaths

With the grace of Almighty God.


Freedom is what we want to achieve – a state wherein we’re  free to get knowledge at the conscious level. The freedom to act based on the particular free thought to get knowledge is always considered good. If we surrender to somebody, it means we are not free to act. To be free one has to act just independent of anything or everything. If we are dependent on something, it means, we are not having freedom.


If we have to be forced to act in a particular manner according to others’  whims and caprice which in fact  is not acceptable to as then our freedom would be curtailed proving that freedom cannot be gained simply by surrender.


In spiritual plane, surrender is considered one of the highest traits to get optimum results. For example, we have to follow the religious scriptures which are also based on experiences over a period of time and stand the test of time. Here the freedom of thought and action would be open to discussion. We have to surrender some worldly wishes (Sansarik bhabhnian) in order to get inner peace and spiritual awakening. We have to dissolve ourselves for getting benefits spiritually.

Freedom belongs only to the consciousness and awareness. So one requires surrendering one’s ego and the mind only, otherwise one’s consciousness and awareness is already free. And those who do not have the ego, do not require surrender of any kind, as per my opinion.

Conversely it is the freedom from ego-sense and selfishness which is the bedrock for surrender to the Divine.


Importantly, knowledge is a power, when got in an atmosphere of freedom. It empowers people.  In the ancient Indian traditions, the knowledge was imparted to the pupils (Shishya) by the Gurus (Teachers) in Gurukulas (Guru means teacher and Kula means family like atmosphere). These Gurukulas used to impart educational instruction in the open sky with clean ambiance and with free flow of information. It was based purely on Guru and Shishya (Teacher and pupil) based on wide ranging subjects. The pupils were free to ask questions and get their concepts cleared. Here the disciples (Shisha) were given ample opportunities to quench their thirst of getting knowledge without let or hindrance and thereby remove the ignorance prevailing.


Essentially, an individual’s holistic growth could be made possible when one has got freedom of thought and to act on the basis of that thought. Here too, free flow of information from other sources is a must. Seemingly, a society  wherein citizens enjoy autonomy of thought and to perform, there is more initiative and creativity due to self-motivation; thereby more productivity in free atmosphere.  The freedom of thought and action are the two essential ingredients for success in any field of activity. Apprehension of any sort creates confusion and deceleration in growth.


Freedom is a state wherein we have autonomy of thought and action with a view to acquire knowledge at the conscious level. This freedom of action is based on the free flow of thoughts to get knowledge. To be free one has to act just independent of anything. If we are dependent on something, it means, we are not having freedom. If we have to be forced to act in a particular manner according to others’  whims and caprice which in fact  is not acceptable as then our freedom would be curtailed proving that freedom cannot be gained simply by surrender.  Surrender should be of our pride, ego, etc.   Therefore, we can enjoy getting experiences in life in an atmosphere of freedom while observing some norms.  


Freedom belongs only to the consciousness and the awareness. So what we require is surrender our ego and exercise mind control/self-control. Our consciousness and awareness is already free and those who do not have the ego, do not require surrender of any kind, as per my opinion.


In spiritual plane, surrender is considered one of the best traits to get optimum results. For example, we h**ave to follow the religious scriptures which are also based on experiences got over a long period of time and have stood the test of time. Here freedom is to go within and obtain satiety. While we are having inner peace, then we can have optimum contribution since we know how to utilize our inner potential. For this to be reality, it is necessary to surrender our egocentric tendencies along with greed, anger and animosity for others and imbibe empathy, helpfulness and goodwill for our fellow beings.


The maxim, ‘Man is born free but everywhere he is in chains’ stands good with all of us. When we are born, we do not know what the meaning of being free but thereafter, we remain dependent on others; such as, on mother and others for meeting his/her needs after birth. When child is admitted in school, he/she is not free as in studentship he/she has to remain within the norms set by the school. After schooling, college, university and in professional life, he/she has to work under rules and regulations of the organisation he/she is working. Subsequently when he/she marries, have children, have to maintain relationship with other members of his/her family. Here too, nobody can say,  in such a scenario, the particular person is free to act whatever he/she wants because of different pulls and pressures. It could conveniently be said that breaking free means, breaking from the family fabric we cannot do so since we cannot work in vacuum.

While working under the framework of country’s constitution and norms set by the society, we can enjoy various freedoms and ensure our holistic growth and development.


Freedom should be from ego-sense and selfishness which is the bedrock for surrender to the Divine. On spiritual plane freedom is very difficult to follow. Here we have to surrender to God’s will with total detachment in order to obtain Divine bliss. We have to have particular conditional behavior. Bhagwad Gita says that we cannot be Karma Yogi without total surrender. We have to renounce the desires for self aggrandizement. abandoning the fruits of our actions then only a person could be termed as a true Yogi.


For freedom to be of any substance, it is essential that we have freedom of mind; bereft of ego and selfishness while we express our thoughts, emotions/feelings and action we perform on the basis of these thoughts. The expressions of thoughts should be within the boundaries of moral and ethical standpoints. Factually we cannot unravel the human essence and excellence which enables us to unravel our inner potentials; without freedom of mind. 

Freedom of mind also ensures peace of mind without any disturbance which may cause inner tremors. Here we also have to be consciously aware to know when and how our mind gets disturbed and remain detached from those causes which disturbs our inner balance.


In democratic form of Government, the people have the freedom to choose their OWN representatives who frame laws for their wellbeing. If such representatives are performing their duties well, they are chosen again otherwise they are voted out of power and another party comes to power. One negative thing in democratic form of Government is when some corrupt people command majority by dint of its muscle power or financial influence. 


We are aware that love is a binding force. With love even a brute could be tamed. For love to flourish without any hindrances, it is essential to have freedom to love for our parents, relatives, neighbours, our friends, even to a stranger when he/she feels disturbed.


In democratic form of Governments, there is freedom of expression, freedom to eke out a living for ourselves, freedom to choose our profession along with freedom to follow our own faith.







We all are aware that India is a home to multicultural, multilingual, multicultural and multi-religious society. We can pride ourselves in having different festivals too. These festivals are seasonal, traditional, culture based, religion based or for that matter any other sacred considerations. Here every caste, religion and region have contributed its mite for enriching the cultural traditions. One thing is sure that the zeal and enthusiasm that accompanies with these festivals is second to none.

We Indians enjoy all the religious festivals –  be it Eid or Prakash Divas/Gurpurab or as a Muslim enjoy Diwali or all of them enjoy Christmas Day together. That is the beauty of India. I do not dispute that hotheads are there in any strata of life, those who do not know about their own religious festivals or of others.  One thing which pleases us is the perceptible shine on the faces of every one of us while celebrating any festival!  That is the beauty of it all ewmains in tact despite some differences notwithstanding.


Lohri festival is celebrated in Northern Indian states. It is celebrated on 13th January – in the month of Pauch or Magha, one day before Makkar Sankranti. We term this festival as a community based festival where Bhangra (dance by men folks) and Gidha (dance by women folks) to the beats of drums which bring vitality and jollity to the celebration. Youngsters, by and large, take pleasure in kite flying and enjoy the occasion.

On this festival, seasonal dry fruits peanuts, coconut are mixed with jaggery (Gur) and sesame seeds (til) to make the eatables. Besides, milk cakes are specially made and distributed amongst relatives and friends.

Following are some of the reasons for the celebration of Lohri festival:-


 It marks the end of winter season and beginning of sowing of some crops and harvesting the others. It infuses vitality and special enthusiasm in the lives of people – especially the farmers. The Lohri festival symbolizes prayer to the fire (Agni puja) in the evening. In the people take parikarma (rounds) around the bonfire and shower offerings to fire. Fire ritual or Agnihotra (Specially lit fire – Havan) is the process of purifying the environment and people also consign to fire a mix of rice, peanuts, walnuts, almonds besides sesame seeds (til) and jaggery to the fire before distributing and taking the same themselves.


It is believed that the fire ritual has a special significance and possesses healing power besides it helps in well-being of all along with its benefits in farming too. Special bounties are asked on this day for the well-being and prosperity of all besides peace in the entire households. Newly wedded couples and newly born babies receive special attention on this festival. People give alms to the needy on this occasion.

Different Legends behind the Lohri festival:-


The legend of Dulla Bhatti (Rai Abdullah Khan) is very popular. It is a legend of a Rajput warrior who saved a damsel in distress belonging to the Hindu religion from the clutches of lustful and greedy officials. The brave Rajput adopted her as his own daughter without let or hindrance and married her off to a young and suitable Hindu boy. He also gave her presents – nine mounds of sugar along with other gifts etc on her marriage. This shows that there was a community feeling during those days. If during those feeling for each others was rampant then why not now! To appreciate his gesture, the people sing the following song describing the event and also mentioning about the beauty of the girl who was saved. We used to go to the houses in our neighbourhood and used to sing and used to get sweets made for this particular day. This song is sung by the youngsters even now on this occasion.  :-

Sunder mundriye ho!
Tera kaun vicaharaa ho!
Dullah bhatti walla ho!
Dullhe di dhee vyayae ho!
Ser shakkar payee ho!
Kudi da laal pathaka ho!
Kudi da saalu paatta ho!
Salu kaun samete!
Chache choori kutti! zamidara lutti!
Zamindaar sudhaye!
bade bhole aaye!
Ek bhola reh gaya!
Sipahee far ke lai gaya!

There is also a legend of Sant Kabir and his wife names Loi. He used to love his wife immensely. So much so intense was his passion for his wife that one day, he reached his home in the middle of dark night, travelling from a far off place. The door was closed from inside. His wife was sleeping on the first floor. Finding that there was no ladder, he took the help of a rope hanging from the first floor of his house. When his wife saw him, she was very surprised and asked him as to how he had entered the first storey. There upon, she along with Kabir saw that the help with which he had reached the first storey was with the help of a hanging python.

His wife got upset and in desperation mentioned: The passion which he was having for her, if he had the same fervor  for the God, he could excelled in anything including finding the God!

Subsequently, we know the life Sant Kabir who was a mystical poet whose writings had a deep effect on Bhakti Movement and his verses find place in Sri Guru Granth Sahib too.

He was brought up in a Muslim family but was deeply influenced by his teacher Ramananda but he criticized both in his verses because of his close proximity with both and knew ins and outs of these religions. In his writings, he has emphatically mentioned that the God is only with those who follow righteousness and also one who follows a detached mode of life. His followers are known as Kabir Panthis.

It was due to the timely advise of his wife named Loi that Kabir had a huge transformation in his life and became a well known Sant who influenced millions with his writings. Lodi or Loi is also celebrated in his and his wife’s honour who was instrumental in molding him.



Makkar Sankranti is celebrated in the month of Paus (January) Makar Sankranti is the day when the Sun God enters the Northern Hemisphere. Hindus like Greeks worship Sun God – the giver of immense energy. Sun God is termed as the manifest God, having all the glorious divinity. It is worthwhile to mention here that mantra OM ADITYA AYE NOMON and many other mantras are recited in order to get the blessings of the Sun God.

The devout also chant Gyatri Mantra, taken from Rig Veda while making final offering to God. which is from Rig-Veda, as Makkar Sankranti is associated with cosmic event which affects the life of humans immensely.

Om Bhur Bhuvaḥ Swaḥ
Tat-savitur Vareñyaṃ
Bhargo Devasya Dhīmahi
Dhiyo Yonaḥ Prachodayāt.

Which means: We meditate and adore thee the Supreme Lord, the Creator of everything, who’s Divine Light illuminates all spheres of activity (physical, mental and spiritual). We pray that this Divine Light may light-up our intellect forever.

This festival is celebrated with gaiety and enthusiasm in all  parts of India with different names at different places but the keenness remains the same. Devout get up early in the morning, take bath in holy rivers first take the blessings of their elders and then offer prayers in the temples. After having offered prayers, people give alms to the needy according to their capacity. In the afternoon people share a special Khichri (Hotchpotch – a mix of dall-urdh and dal).



The Pongal festival is celebrated in South India (Especially in Tamil Nadu, Puducherry and even in foreign lands such as Sri Lanka, Malaysia, Singapore etc.). This festival is celebrated for four days (14th to 17th January). This is a harvest festival dedicated to the SUN GOD. The Sun is a huge source energy which helps in growing the crops from sowing to the harvesting. It also includes boiling of the rice of season sanctified to the Sun which is termed as Surya Mangalyam.  Not only this, the natural energy in the form of solar energy is being utilized enormously presently.


Every festival is linked with some seasons

Or certain well known occasions.

Lohri a winter festivals of repute

Falls in the month of ( 13th Jan) Paush

Marks the end of winter season

And beginning of longer – a little hotter days ahead soon

For farmers,  it is one of the happiest occasions

They start harvesting rabi crops

Start of spring season is a Natural bounty

Adds additional spice to festivities.

(Rabi Crop: Wheat, Gram, Pea, Mustard, Linseed, Barley, Peas)

Traditionally, on lohri day a bonfire is lit

People congregate around it

And reverently offer, Jaggery (gur), sesame seeds (til)

Sesame coated sugar candy and popcorn into leaping bonfire

The skyward leaping fire

Which purifies the atmosphere

It also shows that it (fire) too is enjoying all acts of hers

Gathering partake the sacred offering themselves too as (parsad) offering

Satiety writ large in everybody’s faces.

Offerings too is made to ‘panj tatavas’ five elements of nature

Fire, wind, water, ether and earth

Going around the bonfire with great reverence

And singing traditional songs with dance makes huge difference.

And that too in tune with beating of drums!

Tradition has it that there was a very brave person of repute

Named Dulla Bhatti from lineage of warrior race of the Rajputs

In the reign of Mughal king Akbar

He used to rescue poor girls from the clutches of robbers

And got them married to suitable boys of choice

People sing Lohri songs with gust in his praise.

Thence other legend of the origin of Lohri

From the wife of Saint Kabir named ‘Loi’

Herself a lady so pious.


Lohri too is linked with Makar Sakranti

Which too is another winter festival very famous

Celebrated one day after Lohri celebrations

A day so fixed

14th January –  indeed very sacred

It marks the beginning of solar maagha masa

Makar Sankranti is start of harvest festival

And beginning of pleasant Spring Season

Celebrated in all parts of country.

It has its origin to the movement of the earth

Sun movement begins from (Sankranti) one zodiac sign

Into another – Capricorn zodiac (Makar) sign

Two movements  are termed as Makar Sakranti.

This day marks the beginning of warmer days

As the sacred months start from this day onwards

Makar Sankranti  is celebrated with great fervor

In western and northern India

There is a mention of this day in Mahabharata

As, it is the festival of Sun God

Who gives us light and heat

To living beings without bias

And bestows us divinity and wisdom,

Thus holding an eternal meaning.

Then there is festival called Pongal

Which is dedicated to Sun God

A huge source of energy indeed

Which is life giving

To living beings.



In essence, Mother Nature provides natural setting for the living beings to produce of their own kinds. But in case of humans, this production is done within the norms of the institution of marriage. This is done to let the civilization ticking.  In this institutionalized marriage, the offspring born out of this nuptial, the following benefits are there:-

  • There is a stamp of the society in which the couples are living.
  • Both the couples aspire to fulfill their respective responsibilities for the overall benefit of their family.
  • The progenies are learn value systems from their parents.
  • The culture and tradition of the family could be transferred to their children when it is hugely needed.
  • The parents ensure the financial security of their offspring from child-birth onward.
  • The children are bestowed with congenial environment for their upbringing under the care and protection of their parents.
  • Here both the parents give their quality time to their children for refinement of their habits, attitudes and other mores of behavior.
  • In married life, when the parents grow old, they are looked after by their children Just as they have been cared when they were children.
  • In the institutionalized marriage, both the parents can make their lives compatible, make adequate adjustment whenever and wherever required.
  • Differences in the institutionalized marriages can arise but these could be ironed out with mutual consultation or if need be, with the intervention of the elders in the family.   
  • In the institutionalized marriage, there is tacit understanding between the parents and both the parents and grandparents (if they are alive), therefore, if some differences arise the same could be solved with mutual consultations to save the situation from going to  the court for separation. Even in the court, the stress is to give chance to the couple for sorting out differences.
  • When the lives of the offspring also is involved then the cumbersome procedure of custody will have to be followed. Wisdom is to make peace and not let these hapless children to become victims of quibbling between the parents.


Live-in relationship is recent phenomenon. The proponents of this type of relationship say that this is necessitated for understanding each other; their temperaments, behavior pattern, attitude etc. These people could be termed as rebellious one – the conventional sort of relationship which has got society’s stamp on it therefore has legal bindings too.

Living-in relationship is already till it works. It can break sooner differences could arise because there is almost no legal obligation attached with such relationship. Be that as it may, this relationship stays till the partners want and breaks up when they want it to break. Then what about the children out of this live-in relationship? These hapless ones are left to fend for themselves for their growth and development.

There are so many loop-holes some of which are given below:-

  • In live-in relationships, as there is no legal obligation, the two part their ways when there is some difference of opinion.
  • Once this relationship breaks up, both the partners are adversely affected more so the females,
  • Purpose of live-in relationship is to fully understand each other (male and female) – attitudes, habits etc. but more often than not, if experience is a guide, the rate of failure of relationship is more pronounced than success rate.
  • In live-in relationship as both the partners are rebellious of the institutionalized marriage, both prefer freedom of thought and action and too much of freedom becomes a cause of disruption in their relationship.
  • Then both live together both have their soft emotional upsurges – having sex and sometimes safe and other times unsafe; the natural corollary of this is having children from this live-in relationship.   


All living things produce like their own kind

Which grows from one stage to other

And then just give up the ghost

The young ones take their place

This just continues.

In humans it is through customary institution called marriage

Between the opposite sex

It is a  game not so complex

To keep ticking the cock of culture & tradition

Without any disruption

One thing we should not forget at all

Men & women are a little unlike on physical plane

But in all other aspects both are in sync with each other

Women are empowered with oceanic emotions

More than men-folks, if we hazard a comparison

The marriage as a recognised institution

Was created for reproduction

So that our offspring are looked after well

In more congenial atmosphere

With responsibility of both the spouses

For upbringing of the progenies

Showering love and affection

Including everything provided

For upbringing of offspring

In the family fabric

With value system and cultural mores

Transferred so willingly

In our family

We enjoy

The happiness

Or share

Our sadness together

Our pain is reduced through sharing

By our family members so caring.

Then now a days

Some people are substituting live-in relationships

With institutionalized marriages

In the process just knocking down

The institution of marriage

May be there are some drawbacks in it

 Among us the rebelling ones

Think matrimony as bondage

For appeasing the ego

With extra liabilities to boot

Are demolishing the very idea; so pious

‘Marriages are settled in heaven

And solemnized on earth’

They consider living together

Can provide them liberty

To get what they actually want

For satisfaction of their lust

For free, they say

For them that is what the marriage stands-for

The initiators of live-in relationship

May think that only in married lives

Fights take place, as a routine

They are miserably living in fool’s paradise

Humans have the tendency to fight

With each other on silly pretext

Live-in or recognized relation hardly makes much difference

Live-in relation is the result

Of immaturity and lack of understanding

Of human relationship

Institution of marriage so sacred

Is created for binding us together

For sharing and caring for each other

Alternative or substitute for this holy marriage

Undertaken with chanting of hymns from Vedas

Or at the Altar or any other method

Which has community’s indelible stamp

Is more productive and more enduring

Creating love and affection for the couple

And the progenies from that relationship

There is a deep sense of commitment.

In the live-in relationship

This commitment is missing

In turn creation of more miseries

For the living partners

Are created in the process

What about the children produced

Who are born out of this cohabitation??

These hapless are left to fend for their own selves

At the mercies of their own destinies.

It should never be forgotten

That human relations are formed

With deep sense of emotions

If deep emotions are missing

Only lust without trust remains

Producing psychosis symptoms in the long run

Both for women and men.

By living in relationship

We are destroying established relationship

Without creating suitable substitute

In the process killing both the tradition

And cultural ethos in the process.

In institutionalized marriages

Stability of mind and uncertainty are negated

One is living on imagination in live-in relationship

Enjoying their lusty today

No worries of tomorrow

Of the consequence of their lust-based love

Who would look after the resultant children out of this live-in

With no sharing of burden that accrues

Out of this unethical relation.

What is selfless love?

What is selfless love?

Love means adore somebody without any expectation in return. When somebody likes other, then there is no doubt about anything or everything connected with it. It is self-sacrificing – based only on giving and nothing else. It is selfless love as a love which is all encompassing. I love my Creator, my country, my parents, my spouse, my children, my likes, my self-esteem besides all the friends I come across in life. In all these, I have not get anything in return. All these are very essential for me. For keeping this love, I shall go all out in up-keeping it.

Essentially, when you love somebody, you do not have any suspicion on the person on whom you have liking in true sense of term.  It is seamless and with whomsoever you are in love, you possess natural relationship or association and would like to live with that person you are in love with.

One of the best traits of love is; it produces flexibility, ease and peace. Where love sprouts, there is no sign of hate. The love produces a ting in the heart. In other words, love originates from heart – it is emotional upsurge.

A self-less love is the love from which we have not to get anything return. A person with selfless love will go an extra-mile to prove his/her love for the person he/she is in love with.

When we feel emotional upsurge for others then our soft feelings gets upper hand and we transact everything with ease and peace.


A love where we prefer losing
A love which is not demanding
A love which knows only sacrificing

A love which gives joy in giving
A love which teaches us ethical and moral values of living
A love which is beyond any suspicion

A love which paints everyone with humane touch
A love which gives a sublime attitude a gentle push
A love which has Divine grace for its success under all conditions.
A love which dies not at all
A love which broadens its base without bias
A love which gives lasting synergy even in bad state.

A love which cares not for caste, color or creed
A love which excels in every way we feel
A love which kindles trust amongst soul-mates.

A love which is eternal and supremely magical
A love which is not theatrical
A love which is God sent and not mechanical.

A love which asks nothing in return
A love which burns all suspicions in turn
A love where differences get resolved on the basis of trust.

A love which cares not, even if the ultimate result is supreme sacrifice
A love which showers only fragrance

A love which emanates from our inner self.

A love which remains unaffected as time passes doubtlessly
A love wherein even slippery time puts its indelible stamp of its immortality
A love we would like to quote for its sacredness always.

Loving others is synonymous with cementing relationship

But loving one’s own self is easily said than done

As love is a very sensitive and unconditional

It has to be pure and sincerity attached

The person concerned should also be pure in all manifestations

Purity in thoughts, habits and actions

Person concerned has to rid dross and impurities

Cleansing all the negativities from the system

By imbibing spirituality as the way of living

Thus associating our Creator with everything done or undone

As selfless love has sacredness attached with it

It can make residency in the heart

Of a person who is sacred in nature.