March 2022 – INNER THOUGHTS

OUR BELIEFS

OUR BELIEFS

The convictions we hold dear
The values we imbibe and follow with care
The principles we practice
Help form our moral fiber
The foundation of which are laid by the beliefs we have.

Self-belief is formed
Through continuous personal experiences
Where every failing
Or an uncontrolled free-fall
Gives us will to stand again
And face challenges
With vigor yet again.

The beliefs are the bulwarks
Within which we form our opinions
These are the ones
Which we pursue
And make our life purposeful despite pitfalls.

Universal acclaimed beliefs
Are the ones which are clear as day
Since there is no doubt or confusion about these
Even though there may
Or may not be any solid proof to sustain
Of their existence, in actual practice.

What we believe with utmost sincerity happens!
Since limiting ourselves
Is a self-defeating act
And creates log-jam
For further move ahead.

OUR BELIEFS

**POSITIVE RAAYS ARE MADE THROUGH THE MEDIUM OF OUR POSITIVE BELIEFS**

Our beliefs are the values or convictions or principles or standards of behavior primarily based on our judgment of what is important for us in life. Beliefs also are referred to as the convictions or acceptance that something exists and is true, especially with or without proof. Then there are beliefs which help us how best to proceed in life – these are positive beliefs.

UNIVERSALLY ACCEPTED BELIEFS

As far as universally accepted or acclaimed truths or actualities are concerned, there is no doubt since these are with crystal clear proof for their being truthful. Meaning there is rigidity in accepting those beliefs to be true as we take them as our own without even a shred of reservation.

In essence, there are some events and happenings which we accept as true even though there is no proof or evidence of its actual existence or happening. But in actual practice, one thing is sure, we all are what we believe. If we believe we are capable of doing something and put in sincere hard work towards to accomplish or acquire that then all the elements in the universe combine in assisting us.

***OUR BELIEFS LEADS TO POSITIVE AMBIANCE***

In Bhagwad Gita it has rightly been said: ‘Man is made by his belief, as he believes so he becomes’.

Then when a person is shown an evidence or proof of some variation in the existing belief, there are people who stick to their existing beliefs with proof or evidence notwithstanding. This rigidity in belief differs from person to person.

These beliefs are accepted by every normal person, considered as positive belief and accepted without any hesitation. These are:-

THERE IS POSITIVE HOPE EVEN IN DARKNESS IF WE HAVE FIRM BELIEF

• We are the product of our own beliefs.
• Limiting yourself is against law of nature.
• Our Karma is a prime mover of our existence.
• Our empirical experiences teach us much.
• With self-assurance comes with self-awareness.
• With self-belief and solid belief on God can deliver us from piquant situations.
• Be truthful if you want to succeed in life.
• Love begets love.
• We’ve to work in order to succeed – there are no shortcuts in life.
• Silence speaks more than our words.
• Staying calm while facing any emergency helps.
• Our failures teach us more than our successes.
• Our traditional beliefs are learned from our family.
• Formal and informal institutions teach us how best to live our life.
• Our empirical or practical experiences teach us how best to adjust in life.
• We should not be reactive in any situation or condition.
• All the negative traits such as jealousy, malice, greed, anger and to be reactive nip our creative instincts.
• Our culture and traditions influence our life.
• Pros and cons should be accepted as given in our life.
• Adversity is a great teacher.
• Everything happens for a reason.
• Our healthy criticism and even doubt should be taken with a grain of salt.
• When you cry, you cry alone but when you laugh everybody will laugh with you – be steadfast with time everything will get better.

There are umpteenth self-belief positive thoughts which can help us live a meaningful life and deliver us of any piquant situation in which we willy-nilly engross or entangle ourselves. In other words, adversities would certainly be there but deliverance from these would also be there with self-belief.
Then there are negative beliefs which can pull us down and reduce our self-assurance and inculcate insecurities. These are:-

• I am a born loser and cannot improve myself.
• Destructive criticism could adversely impact our healthy growth.
• I may not perform better this time too.
• Our failings distract us.
• Fearing to take risk in life.
• Examination and result related trepidations.
• I shall never improve.
• Fear of darkness.
• Fear of death.
• I am worthless.
• I am introvert.
• Everybody treats me badly.
• I am below par.
• To be stony silent rather than stoic silent.

In fact belief is to accept something as true even though there may or may not be any tangible evidence about its existence. We believe in the existence of God even though we may have seen Him in person. But still there are people who have contrarian views on this. It shows that our beliefs are subjective.

INDOMITABLE BELIEF IN GOD

Belief is to have total trust in God’s existence and His will. It is also a fact that we have to believe the teachings and wisdom contained in religious texts because these contain ocean of knowledge and wisdom which is worth emulation by humans for living a sublime life.

In Bible, it has been articulated that our belief (Convictions, principles, trust etc) has been given significance. It has been mentioned that we should love God, love our neighbor as we love ourselves, forgive the person who has wronged you, pray God to forgive your sins through repentance etc. Whatever we do, we’ve to be truthful and not be two-faced since dual role cannot bring us any dividends. If we have this belief in our own self, then, nothing can go amiss in our life.

It could be explained that there two basic facts for acceptance of a belief: truth about the belief is the acceptance of an authority depending on the power of authority and secondly truth of facts based on empirical and validated with proof which is accepted without doubt.

Our beliefs could be summarized as:-

SELF-BELIEF CREATED THROUGH PERSONAL INVOLVEMENT

There is a always a way out to come out of a problem with sincere effort which could be termed as self-belief acquired empirically or through trial and error method or through total involvement.

IT IS NOT THAT WE ALWAYS WOULD BE SUCCESSFUL IN OUR ENDEAVOUR

We know that everybody puts in his/her efforts the best way possible under the circumstances in which he/she is placed. This belief spurs us to move ahead in life. But still there are times our efforts do not fructify. We can try again and succeed. This comes through self-belief. It could be construed that failure could be taken as stepping stone for success. Meaning, failure is an instrument of learning for ensuring success.

EVERY PERSONS PUTS IN HIS EFFORTS UNDER THE CIRSUMSTANCE IN WHICH ONE IS PLACED

This is a known fact that everybody tries his best in order to get the best.

EVERYBODY SPECIALISES IN ONE ASPECT OR OTHER

It is a fact that every person is unique in his/her capability. Meaning no two individuals are same in his/her potential. What person A can perform may not be possible by person B. All five fingers are not equal but each one has its unique function.

BELIEF THAT WE SHOULD GET IMPROVEMENT ON DAY TO DAY BASIS

It should be our endeavour to improve ourselves on daily basis based on our day to day experience in life. A day wasted without sincere effort cannot be retrieved. Hence day dreaming will not help but putting our dreams in reality makes a huge difference.

WORKING WITH IMPERFECTIONS

It is a fact that everybody cannot be perfect since everybody differs in his/her efforts. Some are slow starters and some are workaholic in order to enhance their knowledge. Meaning potentiality is subjective in nature. Then there are the ones who put in their best with imperfections. It means self-belief is created by putting their best under different set of situations.

BELIEF THAT WE CAN GAIN KNOWLEDGE FROM BIRTH TO OUR END (CREDLE TO GRAVE)

We should have belief that we can learn new things from birth till our last day. We can learn from even a small kid if we care to learn. Nothing should stand in our path in getting something new every moment of our lifetime.

BELIEF THAT THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE GOT THROUGH HARD WORK AND PERSISTENCE

It is an empirical fact and belief that a thing which is acquired through persistence, perseverance and not through day-dreaming. Mere dreaming about a mission but doing nothing about to acquire will take us nowhere. Belief could originate from an individual’s own experience, learning from the previous experiences even from failings and finally having belief on the God. Conviction or acceptance that something is truly is there for us and belief that it will fructify makes a huge difference.

COLOURFUL HOLI FESTIVAL & HOLI DAHAN (BURN OUT NEGATIVITY FROM WITHIN US)

COLOURFUL HOLI FESTIVAL & HOLI DAHAN (BURN OUT NEGATIVITY FROM WITHIN US)

A HOLI THE COLOURFUL FESTIVAL

This Holi should burn out anger, jealousy & all unprincipled and unethical desires
Including the egocentric tendencies from our system forever
So as to make our life sublime full of care
Thus paving the way for spiritual oriented way of life by burning out everything negative that exists in our existence

After a relief from chilling cold, intense one
There is a carnival of colours
The carnival of colour so very well-liked
With the young and old alike
Wherein us all irrespective of age group
Take part with soft-emotions running so deep
Not only put colour on each other
But also partake sweets so very specially prepared with mix of love
Enjoy Bhangra dance and Gidha dance to the tune of drums
With Punjabi song so matching
For this festival of colours so very enjoyable in every way
With everybody wishing others A VERY HAPPY HOLI to boost good over evil.

Preceding one day, Holi Dahan is held
Which portrays burning of evil and all the ills prevalent
Within us with burning of fire of Holi Dahan
Personifying holy fires burning
The sister of Demon King Harnayakashpa (evil) & saving (goodness) Prahalada
Holika represents the evil soul – Atma
Who was burnt alive despite her boon of not being burnt by fire
While Prahalada in her lap remained unscathed
With the blessing of Lord Vishnu, a most compassionate one
Who bestows protective cover on His devotee, infusing common sense in them.

Fact stands out, when body, mind and soul are coloured
In the hue of our eternal Creator
Then a warm emotion love springs-up
With a flood of warmth for each other
Of togetherness in every being participating in the celebrations
Where there is no biases
Based on age, sex, colour, caste or religion or region
Everybody just forgets the narrow-minded based on any distinctions
What remains woefully is the add-on liking
They’ve for each one of them
Mixed with warmth in sentiments
With variety of colours as the variety of people colored
Whosoever meets us on the street corners
Corners us with colours and colors us
Redd, yellow or blue – the choicest in tint
Charming us to a maximum extent.

O Almighty God of ours
Imbue us all with Thy indelible Colour
For Thy color touches our heart’s chords
Including every atoms in our body
Made of five elements which die with our body
(Ether, earth, water, air & fire)
On the death of our mortal body
Only Thy colour and our Soul last
Man made colours just fade away and are lost
After a few hours have passed.

A spirit of Spring Festival springs in us all
Dividing joy and hope between us all
Nature too is in its finest attire – so very colourful
When Mother Nature is at its best
With all around greenery prevalent
There is fragrance of blooming flowers
With Full Moon as though it is chipping in, too showcasing its silvery shine.

To enhance the charm of colours
To share the fun and joy of the people around.

Different people celebrate Holi in different style
But the common thread of celebration remains alike
People prepare special sweets to welcome their dear folks
Shopkeepers & women are busiest lots
Bestowing magnetism to their living places.

Bonhomie pervades wheresoever our eyes could survey
Abuzz with activity mixed with the rainbow of colors
Scenes at the marketplaces are indeed mesmeric.

Legend has it that a mighty and conceited
Demon King Hiranyakashyap prided his prowess the most
He wanted his subjects to worship him in place of God above
Virtuous Prahlad, his own son agreed not
Being a staunch devotee of Lord of Preservation – Lord Vishnu
The King wanted his son to be put to sword – very soon
For not obeying his dictates
Different methods were used to kill but in vain.
Hiranyakashyap had a sister named Holika
Blessed with a boon of not being burnt by blazing fire
Both were made to enter a bonfire at full fury
Thinking fire will harm her not due to boon to her
But just opposite ensued
Prahlad came unscathed with grace of Lord Vishnu,
Whilst Holika met her end most tragic.
Legend too has it that Lord Krishna played holi with his beloved Gopies
To shower love and affection with the shower of colours.
Holi celebrated at Vrindavan, Mathura
And Bursana is so matchless even today
Showing the thread of that time remains in fact intact
People light a bonfire on the night before Holi Day
With devout heart brimming with bliss
Celebrate triumph of good over evil
And also remember how devotion to Lord gets rewarded.
People play with variety of colours
Intoxicated with joy of the day
Pour coloured water to each other
Songs, dance, and beats on the drums abound everywhere
People exchange greetings and pray to God for His bounties.
O God, let the humans not shower bullets at each other
pilling blood of the unfortunates in the process
But rather with a blood-red colour of HOLI
Spreading feeling of brotherhood
Which may engender love for each other
Along with amity and well-being, in the humanity as a whole
Our prayers to Thee our Lord – the Esteemed One
Do colour us all in Thy Holy colour
So that peace and harmony spread amongst all.

The festival of color HOLI finds its mention in Vedas and Puranas (Narad Purana and Bhavishya Purana). There is a practical Archeologists proof through excavation of stone related to 300 BC on which there is an inscription of word ‘Holikotsav’ which means Holi. Even in the ancient paintings, there is a mention of Holi festival – the festival of colour.

**GOD MAY BESTOW PEACE & PROSPERIYY TO ALL AND MAKE LIFE COLOURFUL**

Holi is a Basanta Utsav or Spring Festival – it is a festival of colour (Rangwali Holi) or celebrated of love, celebrated in India, Nepal and other parts of the world where Indians are settled. It is arrival of pleasant Spring season. On the occasion of this festival people forget their differences and connect with their long forgotten friends and relatives. The first day before Holi is Holika Dahan (Burning of Holika Demon) it is also called Chhoti Hili.

Holi has special significance in Braj i.e. in Mathura and Vrindaban region, the birthplace of Lord Krishna. Women-folks playfully hit their men-folks with sticks. This act of theirs is called lath maar the holi (A holi which is played with sticks). Here men are constrained to save themselves from their blows with the help of a shield. There is an air of festivities around in the entire Braj region during this festival spanning for days together. It is a spectacle in the real sense of the term.

In this context, it is relevant to mention the Bhagwad Gita:
Lord Krishna teaches detachment: While one gives up all his material desires meant for the satisfaction of the senses, one who lives freeing from desires and gives up his false ego attains the state of peace and calm.

Holi festival signifies the victory of good over evil. It also signifies the end of winter and arrival of pleasant spring. It is a festival when people forget their differences and thus mend their ruptured relationships. On this day, people hug and wish each other well with fond wish: ‘Happy Holi’ and may the colour of HOLI imbue us in God’s impossible to remove colour so as to spread the feelings of brotherliness and fellow feelings amongst each other without consideration to caste, creed, colour, region etc.

LIFE’S MULTIPLE COLOURS ARE SUSTAINED BY NATURE IN ITS VARIOUS FORMS AND MANIFESTATIONS

In essence, we face multiple problems in our lives while aspiring for material and sensual objects, people become attached to these. Such attachments develop lust and lust generate anger and other baser traits. Anger leads to delusion and delusion leads to mental disorientation. When the mind is bewildered, wisdom is the victim. Loss of wisdom leads to downfall of an individual. In such a scenario, a healthy diversion is a must. Different festivals give us occasion to celebrate with our relatives and friends. We celebrate Holi with our nears and dears. The colourful festival HOLI presents our golden opportunity to share our joys with others. The gifts are exchanged in the form of homemade sweets, such as Gujia etc.

There is a symbolic legend attached to this. There was a demon king named Hiranyakashap. This demon king did hard penance due to which he got a boon that no human could kill him at daytime or at night time. This made him very haughty and egotistical besides excessively arrogant. So much so was he drunk with pride that he passed an order that henceforth nobody would pray God in his kingdom. People should rather pray him in place of God.

He ruled his subjects with the iron hand. Not even the hermits or sadhus were spared. Those who disobeyed his orders were meted out huge punishments or handed out the death penalty. He had a son by the name of Prahlada. He used to worship Lord Vishnu. The demon king felt slighted and very furious when he found that his own son was disobeying his orders hence he gave him an alternative – either he should worship him or face the death penalty after giving various severe punishments which did not deter Prahladha from worshipping Lord Vishnu.

Then Holika the Hiranyakashap’s sister, evil in her intentions offered herself to sit in the bonfire (pyre) with Prahladha; knowing fully well that she would not be harmed because of her special cloak which made her immune to fire. Subsequently, the two entered the roaring fire. Hiranyakashap felt assured that no harm would result to his sister because of protection but his son would meet his end.

After the fire subsided, all felt including Hiranyakashap surprised that Holika got perished in the fire that engulfed her despite her protective cloak but due to the protection and grace of Lord Vishnu, he survived!

Holi was driven from the name Holika. Holika represents/personifies evil and its burning is the end of evil. Pradhan personifies goodness.

One day before Holi, especially after sunset, the pyre is lit, called as Holika Dahan. The ritual symbolises the victory of good over evil. People gather around the fire, sing and dance at the beats of drums. It may have different names in different part of the country but the spirit of the festival is the same – a colourful one.

Holi Dahan also signifies burning of our excessive desires. It is for bringing about a balance in our desires by putting an end to our greed and base internal yearning (Kaama Dahan) – our conquest over our evil or carnal instincts which have made residency in our mind and rely more on detachment from our action.

Subsequently, in the daytime, people celebrate this as a sign of victory of good over evil by sprinkling either the coloured water or dry colour (gulal) of various colour. A real rainbow of colour! In the evening, people, after proper wash, go to their friends and relatives and partake sweets prepared at their homes.

It has also been seen that on Holi festival, people forget and forgive their old enmity and animosity and establish the new relationship with each other. It has been seen that people from all religions participate in this festival. It looks as though all have been imbued and coloured with happiness and goodwill for each other. If such an idea fructifies then there would not be any ill-will for anybody in the society in general.

As all communities activity participate in this festival, they cement their relationships, thus enhance their sense of correlation and cooperation for better compatibility.

People forget their inherent differences and go to each others’ homes with colours and sweets thus a spirit of forgetting and forgiving are created.

One day before actual festival, HOLIKA DAHAN (Burning of symbolic Holika – the sister of Demon King Haranakyshapa) – which is synonymous with burning of evil from our midst. Therefore, this festival helps us burn the evil prevalent in us and establish the kingdom of goodness in our heart.

**LET LOVE PREVAIL AND BURN OUT ILL-WILL FROM OUR MID**ST

Finally, my most earnest prayer to our MOST BENEVOLENT GOD is for peace and prosperity for all. Let killing of innocent end and peace and love prevail everywhere. The disturbing and most heart-rending bombing of general masses including small kids and old and informs in Ukraine should end and better sense should prevail. Let us imbue ourselves in red-color of HOLI of LOVE & AFFECTION for each other rather than blood-letting of innocents.

LESSONS FROM HOLI FESTIVAL

As awareness dawns on us the Holi is not only the festival of colours but also removal of all the illness that is prevalent in our body, mind and soul. The following are some of the lessons from HOLY FESTIVAL OF HOLI: VICTORY OF GOOD OVER EVIL.

The fire of Holi (Holi Dahan) a night before is considered as the fire which burns out the ills which is there in our midst AHUTI OF OUR BAD KARMA at the pyre of HOLI FIRE.
The Holi is a festival to consolidate of our relations by wishing HAPPY HOLI and removal of ill feeling for each other. God grants our good and sound wishes in fact with the spirit of forget and forgive. There is cooperation and wellness when we forgive others.
All our baser thoughts, like Holika met her end and Prahlada survived, could end and there would be prevalent of goodness and peaceful coexistence if we pray to Almighty God especially on this day.
On this day, God grants our wishes if we offer our sincerest prayers.
Lord VISHNU saved Prahlada in the same way we can also be saved from the evil doers with sincere prayers.
My sincerest and honest prayers to God is for world peace and prosperity.

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY

Women are only one of the significant Creations
Of our most Creator so benevolent
Without whom we cannot fathom existence
She is the reservoir of energy (Shakti)
Which she showcases in day to day routines
That’s why we call her the home maker
My warm salutation to her for keeping alive our races
She also races hard to win the battles at home and out of offices.

She gets used to everything with ease
At workplaces or in the cockpit of a plane
She plainly is in the best of her elements everywhere
Even those who used to call her weaker gender
Are constrained to have a second opinion now about her
Her mindset has gone a sea change
But her tenacity and courage in all situations and conditions remains unchanged.

And in their own home and hearth
The best creation of our Creator
Excels in every way and proves
Equal to the occasion at every front she is expected at all times
Confronting the animal of complexity with ease in all fields.

Her day starts in the early hours of morning without any break
In right earnest
Prepares milk or feed for the tiny tots and for elders
Followed by morning tea or breakfast for the entire family members
Their jobs still remains to be done.

Then preparations for going to workplace starts
Since she has to add-on the kitty of family funds
To meet the needs of the members to make up for inflationary pressures
She rises to the occasion without much ado about herself
She does not shirk from any responsibility assigned as a responsible member
But goes an extra-mile to meet the needs of family
To contribute her mite
Stand in good stead in whatever way she is expected
For meeting the myriad of needs of shelter, schooling et al.

She is now capable of running an office with flair
Her new normal is just enormous – just unbounded
Including taking control of flying fighter planes
In this process she faces challenges
Both at home front and at the workplace
With unbroken composure
With insightfulness and with tact at her command
She excels in many a ways in comparison to her men counterparts
Moves files including sensitive ones and what it takes
Moves on the ladder of career devoid of any crutches
Catches on the trend in the market and at workplaces.

Who created everything and everybody
Including the Gods
Without Her this world and universe
Without Her this creation would not have been there at all
My warm salutation to her for proving her mettle at all times and in all situations.

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY

The International Woman Day is being celebrated on 8th March 2022. Let’s give emphasis to our obligation for equitable/balanced growth and development in the field of socio-economic, cultural and ensuring equal opportunity to all genders; in which women-folks play a pre-dominant role. Empowering a woman means empowering the entire unit of a family in a variety of ways.

In Guru Nanak, Raag Aasaa Mehal 1, it has been emphatically mentioned: From woman, woman is born; without woman, there would be no one at all.

Essentially, it is significant to mention the variety of roles and the way they adapt themselves in any situations and conditions is unique in itself. We all know how the women adjust themselves in the homes of their adopted household after their marriage. Only the acclaimed women folks can do this. Then we know how they perform their progressive role as daughters, daughter-in-laws, sisters, spouses, mothers, mother-in-laws, grandmothers, friends etc.

Oftentime, it is observed that the families wherein women are respected, there is dawn of peace and prosperity. And where women are disrespected, relegated to second class citizen besides being neglected, such a family experiences faces hardships and seemingly bad luck in the long run.

It is our common experience that in general, the women are essential constituent of our society since without her; the process of conception and creation cannot be considered possible. Therefore, it is the responsibility of the society to empower her, bestow her due care and protection besides meeting the needed financial succor for her education. It is because when we provide education a female so as to enhance her intelligible understanding and grasp, it will have cumulative effect since after marriage she will in turn impart education to the family of her in-laws while taking care of the education of her own family. A girl child should also be provided spiritual orientation and value system including cultural mores of behavior for her growth and development. This will also bestow her courage to ward her off the deadly grip of steely tentacles of life as and when situations and .conditions befall.

In Quran it has been emphasized, So We said: O Adam! This is an enemy to you and to your wife; therefore let him not drive you both forth from the garden so that you should be unhappy.

It is our duty to give the women-folk their rightful place. A family, wherein the women are not respected and treated with disdain, such a family digs its own grave and ends up in its downfall or ends up in its destruction. Therefore, women should be bestowed a prominent place in the society. In Bhagwad Gita the interaction between Krishna and Arjuna is emphatic:

When irreligion is prominent in the family, O Krsna, the women of the family become corrupt, and from the degradation of womanhood, O descendant of Vrsni, comes unwanted progeny.

In both the Epic periods, the women were respected. Their advice was duly taken on important issues besides household matters. In Epic Age the women enjoyed equal freedom as men. Even they chose their life partners. Swambras were held wherein they used to choose their partners. In both the Epic periods, women enjoyed honorable place. They were also well educated.

WARM REGARDS TO THE VENERABLE WOMEN

WOMAN IN A VARIETY OF ROLES AND AVTARS: AS MOTHER, MOTHER-IN-LAW, WIFE, GRAND-MOTHER, DAUGHTER, SISTER AND AS A FRIEND

HAPPY WOMAN’S DAY

MOTHER

I feel sorry for those who have never known the love of a mother, because by missing this ultimate love, such people may not be able to know the true meaning of love at all. It is also a fact that every mother is a greatest gift of Divine. She is the symbol of indomitable and unconditioned love, affection, adoration, care, a symbol of suffering for others, a symbol of sacrifice, a symbol of selfless service, a symbol of hope for the entire family, a symbol of endurance for others without self-care besides taking responsibility without caring for self as a human being.

Those who are fortunate to experience the love of a mother know what this sacred relationship means. I was hugely influence by my mother since I lost my father (A 1^st World War veteran) when I was studying 8th standard. As an ex-soldier, he lead an active life connected with social service etc. As far as my mother is concerned, she gave me everything which I possess today i.e. value system, my courage of conviction, attitude towards others, way of conducting myself, how to suffer lonely, how best to live with poise and balance even in hard times besides how best to adjust in the joint family. She taught that if we care for present time, the future will be well care for us and what has happened in the past should give us experiences. If the experience is good, we should continue following the same and if bad then we should forget it as a bad dream and clear our head altogether. Although she was not that much literate but she was having all the wisdom of a most endearing and caring mother. Her hand on my head ensured that I shall march ahead in my life. Ultimately, at the ripe age of 95+ I lost her – here too I was very fortunate since on the day (Sunday) I had gone to my home town from my duty place to see my mother. She was slightly indisposed. We were sitting in the courtyard and having breakfast. After her breakfast, she lied down on the cot as as I was massaging oil to her hairs. Low and behold, all of a sudden, there was a deep moan and she was gone. What a death and that too in my presence. Her face reflected satiety even in her death. That is the story of my mother.

MOTHER-IN-LAW

The relationship of a mother-in-law is also one of the important one. Her practical experience in life and love and affection could stand us in good stead. My own mother-in-law not only looked after her own family as a mother but also had a positive influence on our family too.

WIFE OR SPOUSE A MOST LOVING COMPANION

**I & MY SHOUSE WITH 44 YEARS OF TOGETHERNESS**

It has been observed that marriage as an institution becomes a smooth journey when both the spouses act for overall welfare of the family. Before the marriage, a girl in her father’s home is adored immensely. She learns values system, becomes adept in cooking, and other miscellaneous skills such as stitching and keeping the household neat and clean besides taking care of the elders and children in the family. She gets proper education at her parents’ home and when she reaches the marriageable age, a suitable partner is chosen.

It has been rightly said that behind every successful man there is a woman who assists the family as a well-knit unit. She not only assists in miscellaneous/assorted tasks but also ensures that functions of family run smoothly. As a wife or consort, she assists her spouse to bestow unconditional physical and emotional love. Whenever there is hard times, she not only assists her husband in maintaining her husband home but many a times takes up some profession for supplementing the income of the household besides keeping the dignity and honour of the household. She not only respects her husband and remains true to him but also other members of the family to fructify the needs of the family. Her opinion is both acknowledged and respected by all in the family along with take care of the household duties. She acts responsibly, acts with patience and at times have to face opposition but she takes everything in her stride. She is the architect of household who procreates for the family and keeps the civilization ticking. She educates her children and teaches them the value system to her children since as a mother she is the first Guru of a child.

My wife, as any other lady in the family, provides all the succor to my family. She assisted me in every situation. I know when I was financially very stringent, while my children were studying, she pro-actively assisted me in every situation. It may be provision of right education to our children or construction of a habitable home, finding suitable for my progeny besides career selection for them. There will not be any exaggeration in mentioning here that presently I am satisfied with what I am, it is solely due to my wife, my companion for life. I respect her immensely. May God bestow her strength and fortitude to assist my family tide over the harder situation with aplomb with the grace of Almighty God.

SISTER

Although I have got no real sister, yet I know what a relationship as a sister connotes. A sister is the one who grows with you, takes care of you even while gorwing with you. If she is elder sister, she looks after you with care and caution and not let the absence of mother bother you since knows how best to look after the family. In the festivals; she is most sought after. She shows her skill in cooking the best dishes not only for the entire family but also for the guests who visit the household. She conducts herself with smile with everybody while serving the entire family and guests. While during festivals like RAKSHABANDAN, she ties Rakhi to her brothers and the brothers give solmn promise her of her safety and security in front of Divine Mother (The embodiment of Shakti). On the BHAIDOOJ, she applies sacred vermillion and flower on the forehead of her brother(s and and prays for the well-being of her brothers.. She is considered the light of the family besides she spreads love and light in the family including a message that without sisters a house cannot be termed as a home. Thus sisters are the embodiment of tolerance, persistence and when she leaves home after her marriage, the entire family misses her hugely.

DAUGHTER

Our daughters are the light of our homes. Without our daughters, our homes are considered incomplete. I do enjoy the company of my two daughters. While they were small, we looked after them, brought them up in the good surroundings, after their school and college studies thereafter proper professional training they got employment. Now despite being married off and having their own homes to take care, both of them look after me and my wife in the absence of my son who has married and is presently in abroad pursuing a profession. Fortunately, their homes are not that far – in fact walking distance from my home. While I go to attend my office, my daughters after their morning chores, performing other tasks including sending their children to schools pay a visit to my home routinely and take care of my wife. If and when there is any requirement of medi-care or to purchase any groceries, they help both of us. Even they help us choosing our clothes! Both I and my wife enjoy their company to the maximum. What our lives would have been without my daughters? They are the gifts of my dear Bhagwan Ji.

The espoused cause of Government of India BETI BACHAO BETI PADAO is on the dot so that the girl child is cared, protected and provided right type of education because when we teach a girl, it means we are teaching an entire family as a unit because she assists the family she is married in educating her children and others.

DAUGHTER-IN-LAW

This relationship is one of the most important one since if a daughter or sister is married off to another family, the another girl from other family has to be brought in the family fold. I should say, she her relationship for me is just like a daughter being the father-in-law for her and a wife of the son who is brought up and contributes for strengthening the bond in the family. Her contribution for the family is not less than a daughter and a sister who are married off to other family. For her, it is a great thing since she is brought up in a different atmosphere of a family and has to adjust and be adaptive to change in the new setting of another family. My salutation to her since it is not an easy task to assimilate in other environs after being married.

GRAND MOTHER

I was very small child, may be about 5 years, when my grand-mother died. She too died of old-age. I remember her as a tough woman with poise and composure; with her voice full of charm which always attracted children towards her. She remained busy with household chores even in her old-age. One day when sleeping, she did not get up. I tried waking her but in vain. She had given maximum to the family and kept the honour and dignity of the family as a close knit unit.

I am of the firm opinion that wheresoever in a family women are respected and empowered adequately, there is the prevalence of peace, prosperity, contentment, cooperation, empathy, kindness, compassion where every member of the family works for the overall wellness of all the members of the family. In such a family, there is prevalence of respect for elders in the family along with will to come out of the difficult situations together with the motto: UNION IS STRENGTH since this strength comes from SHAKTI which is represented by the WOMEN FOLKS. SHIVA & SHAKTI (PARVATI) for overall good of the family as a whole.

INTERNAL & EXTERNAL CONFLICTS WITH SPECIAL REFERENCE TO WAR IN UKRAINE

INTERNAL & EXTERNAL CONFLICTS

There are individuals who act as bundles of contradictions. They have differing viewpoints on a single topic under discussion. Such people differ on myriad of subjects under the sun. Such people may say something but contradict their own statement tomorrow; proving perceptions change as time passes. Funny it may seem, but it is true! Similar is the case with external conflicts. Whether or not we like it but we’ve to live with this reality.

INNER CONFLICTS

All conflicts fall into two categories: internal and external. Internal conflicts arise when a character struggles with his own opposing desires or beliefs or faiths. It happens within an individual, and it helps develop a strong character because there is always an empirical outcome out of inner conflicts and a better sense prevails always.

There are times when we possess opposing or divergent views on single issue. Sometime we find it difficult to decide which belief to follow, which faith we should profess, which subjects we should pursue while we are student, whether to make peace with our own conflicting viewpoint and reach to a conclusion that thus far and no further would be the best course for me. This conflict goes on in our mind for sometimes till such time we find some plausible explanation to resolve the issue.

Sometimes we are at odd with our own self because of prevailing conflicts in our own mind. We may feel tension due to our own contracting viewpoints. At one point of time, we may not find it easy to select a particular way out.

EXTERNAL CONFLICTS

External conflicts sets a character against someone beyond an individual control. These conflicts start from our homes when our own offspring differ on countless issues impinging on the lives on family members, financial status of the family and other problems at domestic front. Then we’ve conflicting views in our neighborhood, community based issues and broader still issues confronting the country in which we live. The conflicts arise due to unsettled borders issues which may result in wars. This is happening globally impacting the humanity in general. Worst still, there is also a specter of fear of use of nuclear bombs or an accidental nuclear tragedy happens which could happen because the bombs and missiles are freely being used. The persisting conflicts can undo everything for which the humankind stands.

OUTSIDE WARS ARE FOUGHT DUE TO INNER WARS INSIDE THE MINDS OF HUMANS

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We must have observed that outside wars happen due to inner wars inside the minds of people. These inner and outer conflicts are being fought on daily basis. The present war which is going on between Russia and Ukraine is resulting in deaths and destructions all around Ukraine. This war is the result of inner and outer conflicts in human minds mainly due to doubts and suspicions. The play of one-upmanship; the act of outdoing or keeping ahead of others without thinking the final outcome is creating situation which may spin out of control. Due to internal and external conflicts between the two countries more deaths and destructions is happening in Ukraine. More than ten lacs have left their homes and hearths from Ukraine. Besides deaths of hapless people and destruction of properties in Ukraine, this conflict is causing enormous human tragedies and it is escalating by the day.

OUTSIDE CONFLICTS COULD BE DISASTEROUS

**THE ONSLAUHT OF BOMBS & MISSILES IS CREATING DEATHS AND DESTRUCTION**

The attack on the city of Enerhoda and Zaporizhzhir nuclear plant as the war entered second week (10^thday to be precise). The training facility was hit killing some workforce. If the strike could have happened on the nuclear plant then we can imagine the deaths and destructions due to ill effects of radiation since we’re aware what happened in Chernobyl nuclear plant disaster which happened on 26^th April 1986 in the north of Ukrainian SSR in Soviet Union. It resulted in huge human toll besides huge material cost in billion of dollars. One can imagine the disproportional human toll if the bomb strike could have fallen on the nuclear plant and the resultant long term implications on humans and environment? All this would have happened due to unchecked external conflicts. The Security Council, with 15 members, has primary responsibility of maintenance of peace and security is not able to enforce its decisions since the external conflicts continue unabated. Lets see if CJI could help prevent the conflicts?

**BLACK CLOUDS OF INTERNAL CONFLICTS CAN MAR THE OUTER PEACE OF HUMANITY BUT THERE IS A RAY OF HOPE OF MUTUAL CONSULTATION ON THE BASIS OF GIVE AND TAKE**

CONFLICTS HAPPEN DUE TO DIFFERING PERCEPTIONS

We are aware that all conflicts (internal and external) happen because of differing perceptions on a single topic. Some may consider the same topic as insightful, interesting, sensitive etc. while others may consider it useless, eccentric, displeasing one etc. It all depends on the discernment and sense of proportion.

OUR PERCEPTIONS DO KEEP CHANGING

**OUR INNER PERCEPTION KEEP CHANGING WITH CHANGE IN TIME & PLACE**

We should keep in mind that our perception remain changing as we evolve due to our new experiences and knowledge we gain with time and space. Those who remain steadfast or inflexible in their perceptions, cannot evolve owing to new information revolution which is taking place.

OUR PERCEPTIONS REMAIN CHANGING BUT TRUTH NEVER CHANGES

It should always be remembered that truth does not change but our perceptions about that truth may undergo some modicum of change.

CHANGE IN OUR PERCEPTION ABOUT A TRUTH

Yesterday’s truth may be considered as an illusion due to some new insights. It too causes conflicts since many may stick to the old perception.

**THOUGH NATURAL TRUTH NEVER CHANGES BUT OUR PERCEPTIONS ABOUT TRUTH MAY UNDERGO SOME MODICUM OF CHANGE**

Therefore, all outer conflicts should be resolved through:-

MAINTAINING COMMUNICATION WITH THE CONFLICTING PARTIES OPEN

Not having modicum of communication between conflicting parties can create unpredictable problems. If one thinks that persisting problems could be solved through one-upmanship, such a leader is entirely wrong. In this world of ours, power does not grow out of the barrel of gun but through mutual consultation on the basis of give and take.

LISTENING OTHERS VIEWPOINTS PATIENTLY CAN SOLVE EXTERNAL CONFLICTS

**WAR CLOUD COULD BE ELIMINATED WITH MUTUAL CONSULTATION AND ESTABLISHING COMMUNICATION**

Outer conflicts could be solved by listening others viewpoints and giving one’s own and resolving pending issues.

ALL ALTERNATIVES TO BE EXPLORED

Sitting across and seeking alternative solutions could resolve pending issues while letting the issues simmer could spin out of control.

POSITIVE ATTITUDE BETWEEN CONFLICTING PARTIES COULD CREATE CONDITIONS FOR WIN WIN SITUATION

Listening patiently the views of others and giving your own can provide solutions which otherwise could make the matters worst if not solved with positive attitude. Conflicts continued and let to smolder could bring about deaths and destruction as has been happening globally.

DETACHING FROM THE TRUTH MEANS DIFFERING IN INTERNAL & EXTERNAL CONFLICTS

While we detach from the perceptions we considered as truthful, we may detach from internal and internal conflicts.

CONFLICTING OPINION COULD CREATE PROBLEM IN THE FAMILY

It has been observed if we do not have compatibility in our relationship, we could be in for family differences and discord. Adjustment in the family could only happens when we sort out our conflicting opinions on the basis of give and take.

DESIRES OR ASPIRATIONS

Conflict may take place when we entertain conflicting desires on our wants and aspirations. It could also be that our desires may be in conflict with the desires of our relatives and friends.

CONFLICTS DUE TO OUR NEEDS

**THE FIRES OF CONFLICT COULD BE EXTINGUISHED WITH MUTUAL CONSULTATION AND WITH MORE UNDERSTANDING ON THE BASIS OF GIVE AND TAKE**

All of us have different needs based on our habits and style of living. There are people who are squanderer or spend-thrifts and would like to live lavishly but there are the ones who would like to follow simple style of living with no show-offs – humble in their behavior patterns.

CONCLUSION

Internal conflicts could be solved through experimenting the contentious issues headon and not glossed over.

Fighting courageously the inner conflicts soldifies our character and makes it possible to take on outer conflicts with utter determination.

Outer conflicts arise due to difference in perception on issues confronting between the parties concerned.

The outer conflicts could be resolved through establishing communication between the parties concerned and not to let the differences simmer on.

Listening each others concerns patiently and settling issues could pacify the warring parties on the basis of give and take.

Understanding the problem in its entirety and seek solution will sort out differences.

It should be kept in mind that now a days, the outer conflicts are partly due to long standing issues and partly due to media blitz. Both these could be sorted out through positive dialogues between the warring parties by understanding intrinsically the reason of problem and stop unnecessary publicity which plays as spoilsport for sorting out problem.

Internal and external conflicts notwithstanding, one thing should not be forgotten is lucidity in perception about the implications which these conflicts could cause and how best to come out of the piquant situation. For instance, the external conflict between Russia and Ukraine should not bomb nuclear plants otherwise there would be huge deaths and destruction all around besides lasting bad effects of environment.

**DARK CLOUS OD CONFLIXTS COULD BE OBLITRATED WITH THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE BECAUSE THERE IS ALWAYS A RAY OF HOPE BEHIND PITCH DARKNESS**

Our joint effort should be to seek resolution of internal and external conflicts so as to have a peaceful coexistence starting from our homes and ending with countries involved. All conflicts could be resolved through change in our perception on the basis of establishing cooperation, opening communication channels besides having open mind to resolving inner and outer conflicts. The UNO too should play its part, its writ should prevail in resolving the simmering issues, it should not remain as a toothless tiger!
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